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Writing Samples
Band 8

Long distance flight consumes the amount of fuel that a car uses for many years and pollutes the air. Some people think that we should discourage non-essential flights, such as tourists travel, rather than limit the use of cars. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Angsa 2

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It is often argued that long-distance travel by plane uses more fuel and contributes to pollution significantly more than vehicles do over many years.
This
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 has sparked a debate about whether non-essential flights should be reduced. I completely disagree with
this
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 statement, as it could lead to severe repercussions for the global economy and create substantial timing issues. Reducing the frequency of flights could adversely affect various sectors worldwide, as many rely on the speed of aeroplanes. Not only does aircraft significantly shorten transportation time for both people and goods, but it is
also
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 one of the safest methods of delivery.
Furthermore
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, other forms of transport can consume more emissions and contribute more to air pollution
while
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 moving items to their intended destinations.
For instance
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, statistics from the International Organisation of the Petroleum Exporting Countries indicate that aircraft use and emit 34% less harmful gases and emissions compared to vehicles when transferring between locations.
Additionally
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, the global economic system could face a downturn
due to
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 a reduction in number of planes. If
such
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 a proposal were implemented, industries like tourism, healthcare, exports, and business could encounter serious crises, as they heavily depend on air transportation. Kazakhstan serves as a prime example of how significant
this
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 issue can be. Since it does not border any oceans, the airline system is the only means of urgent transport. During the quarantine period, delays caused by transporting countries—
not to mention
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 complete stoppages—led to the tragic loss of lives
due to
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 time constraints. In conclusion,
although
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 aircraft may emit higher levels of emissions, I oppose the idea of reducing planes. No other form of ground transportation can match the speed of aeroplanes, and restricting air travel could become a root cause of difficulties in the global economy.

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Task Achievement
Expand on your points to fully develop your arguments. For example, explain how reducing flights could specifically impact certain economies or sectors beyond tourism, as this will strengthen your overall argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. Consider using linking phrases to better connect your ideas, making it easier for the reader to follow your reasoning.
Task Achievement
Your essay presents a clear position on the topic and is well-structured with relevant arguments and examples to support your viewpoint.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion that frame your argument effectively.
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