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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In many countries, the tradition of having family meals together is disappearing. Why is this happening? What will the effects of this be on the family and society?

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One
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 of the widely discussed issues nowadays is having
meals
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 with family disappear. It is undeniable
meals
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 together in the evening have become an essential part of our life. In
this
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 essay, I will look at the factors responsible for full-
time
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 management and examine the effects it has on our relationships and lifestyle.
One
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 of the main causes of full-
time
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 management is wasting more
time
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 at work. Studies show that 60% of workers obtain full-
time
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 management. Ones come home so late that
parents
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 do not even receive
time
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 for
dinner
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 with their
children
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.
As a result
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, it leads to decreased
time
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 with family. The second cause, in my view, some teenagers do not want to have
dinner
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 with their
parents
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. Because
,
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apply
show examples
parents
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 start to ask about their day and may make a remark during
dinner
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. Teenagers eat
meals
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 in their rooms
due to
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 ones prefer a more private location.
Therefore
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, it leads to disappears having
meals
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 together. The first effect of the relationship with family. It is a result that
one
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 will not trust each other and could not help.
Parents
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 do not know what issues their
children
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 face.
Children
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 will cease maintaining communication with each other in the future
due to
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 not spending much
time
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 with family. Another problem that follows is the impact on their
children
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's lives.
Dinner
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 together means that
parents
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 support
children
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.
One
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 will face issues which are dangerous in their life but will not even tell
parents
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due to
Linking Words
 not gaining support from
parents
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. It leads to a declining relationship between
children
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 and
parents
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. In conclusion, having
dinner
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 together plays a crucial role in a family. So It would not be surprising to see some significant changes in the near future.
In other words
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, if It disappears
this
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 will destroy the family. We should spend more
time
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 with family in order to not face the consequences.

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your ideas and enhance the clarity of your arguments.
coherence
Clarify the main points and ensure that each paragraph directly relates to the topic to improve coherence.
coherence
Focus on improving sentence structure and grammar to enhance fluency and overall readability.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task by discussing causes and effects of family meals disappearing.
coherence
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps structure your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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