In recent years, it has become increasingly common for some members of the public to admire mostly sportsmens and other well-known individuals rather than the professionals like teachers and doctors. This essay will provide the possible reason and some positive and negative arguments.

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It is the social media which is the main factor of
this
Linking Words
trend.
This
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is,
many
Correct word choice
because many
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companies are taking advantage of famous people’s faces in order to get immediate profit which means as soon as they post on celebrity endorsement ads, these ads can easily bring targeted leads
due to
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the immense popularity of these figures. If it
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
to continue
this
Linking Words
way, inferior outcomes might take place.
For example
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: an over-reliance on celebrities can lead to disrespect towards professionals who play an integral role in society, allowing people to start to overlook their performance. Given that, the professionals who always contribute to the development of the world should be appreciated not only financially but
also
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socially.
However
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, having paid attention to the media personalities, not only does it bring financial growth, but
also
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it is beneficial for the enhancement of particular countries’ reputation and cultural standing.
For instance
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: bloggers in countries like Dubai,
Russia
Correct word choice
and Russia
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are highly valued by the government as they have the power to shape public perception,
further
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preserving cultural heritage and customs by organising local events.
As a result
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, they are promoted with incentives
such
Linking Words
as financial support,
exclusive
Correct word choice
and exclusive
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partnership
Fix the agreement mistake
partnerships
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. The more respect or reward they receive, the more motivation they get which is crucial for them to succeed in their field. In conclusion, social media is a primary reason affecting people’s attitude towards professionals
while
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the role of famous people is an essential part
to maintain
Change preposition
of maintaining
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local customs

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Task Achievement
Expand on your points with more detailed explanations or examples. For instance, you could elaborate on how social media can lead to disrespect towards professionals.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider providing a clearer connection between your points. For example, linking how celebrity endorsements impact public perception directly back to the respect for various professions in the conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure to properly format examples without using colons in the middle of your sentences, as this can disrupt the flow of reading.
Task Achievement
Your introduction effectively outlines the main topic and indicates what will be discussed in the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
You present a balanced view by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of the trend, which is a strong point.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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