IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Advertising is becoming more and more common in everyday life. Is it a positive or negative development?

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Nowadays,
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advertisments
Correct your spelling
advertisements
 and campaigns are becoming more popular and seeing them everywhere in our day-to-day lives.
This
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 essay will discuss both the positive and negative developments of
this
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 issue and
also
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presents
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present
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 my opinion. On the one hand,
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Advertisments
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Advertisements
 are common
thesedays
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these days
in
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on
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 Televisions, radios and bill
boardings
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boarding
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, which
enables
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enable
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the
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apply
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people's
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people
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 need
of
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to
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 not
searching
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search
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 everywhere for the
products
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 they want to buy.
Moreover
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,
this
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is helping
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helps
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 us to know which product is safe and unsafe and
also
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in knowing
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to know
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 the unfamiliar items with
the
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apply
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better uses.
For example
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, in New York City,
Time
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Times
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 Square showcases all the
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advertisments
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advertisements
that's
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that are
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 happening all over the world, which helps
the
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apply
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people
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 to know about different things and keep them updated all the time.
Conversely
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, some
people
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 contend that
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advertisments
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advertisements
advertisement
shows
Verb problem
have
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 negative
affects
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effects
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 on
people
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's wealth because of their fake publicity making them fooled by their fake
products
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. Most advertising industries
thesedays
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these days
 are bringing
the
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apply
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low quality
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low-quality
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products
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 and promoting
it
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them
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 on
televisions
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television
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 and making
people
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to
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apply
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buy those
products
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 but
actually
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actually,
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 they are fake.
Hence
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,
this
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 is
also
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 considered an enormous problem. In Manchester,
for instance
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, a survey conducted in 2021 on detergent
products
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 revealed that
the
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apply
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most
people
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 are not satisfied with the product, which made them buy after seeing the television
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advertisments
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advertisements
. In conclusion,
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advertisments
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advertisements
has
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have
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 benefits if they showcase
the
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apply
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quality
products
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 and real information.
Otherwise
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, it
effects
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affects
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on
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apply
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the
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apply
show examples
people
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's money by purchasing those
low quality
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low-quality
show examples
products
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 and
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also
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is also
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 considered
as
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apply
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a major drawback. So, it's better to follow the real content and
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advertisments
Correct your spelling
advertisements
.

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grammar
Check for spelling mistakes in your essay, such as 'advertisments' (should be 'advertisements') and 'thesedays' (should be 'these days'). Prioritize proofreading for grammatical accuracy and vocab usage.
coherence
Consider enhancing your topic sentences to clearly state the main idea of each paragraph. This will help improve the logical flow between your ideas.
task achievement
Try to avoid phrases like 'most people' without specifying a clear subject for better clarity. Providing exact data or detailed examples can strengthen your arguments and make them more persuasive.
structure
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. It's good to see that you have stated your opinion in the introduction.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • promote
  • economic growth
  • provide information
  • awareness
  • job opportunities
  • manipulative
  • misleading
  • consumerism
  • materialism
  • invade
  • personal space
What to do next:
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