In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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These days, in some countries across the world the main migration that become really popular among their inhabitants is that they like to move to the urban areas and from villages;
as a result
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, the number of people in rural regions is reducing. In my opinion,
this
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trend is a negative development owing to the fact that it has an adverse effect on the environment and food production. On the one hand, the fact
that is
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really important is that when the population of cities increases,
then
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air pollution and deforestation will rise.
In other words
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, overpopulation in cities is the main reasons for traffic congestion that are emitted a lot of toxic gases from vehicles and affect global warming.
In addition
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, the community who live in urban areas require residential regions, so governments should destroy jungles, which are the habitats of several wild creatures, to contracture various accommodations for urbanization.
On the other hand
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, most of the rural citizens are farmers and they have an essential effect on people’s food chain.
Therefore
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, if these people migrate to the cities,
then
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the sectors of land that are under agriculture decrease. In fact, the number of vegetables, fruits, meat, and other dish ingredients is reduced.
Thereafter
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,
this
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fashion put countries, in the short run, in famine situations.
To sum up
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, the emigration of populations who live in the countryside to metropolises is not eco-friendly and has an unfavourable influence on countries' food inasmuch as in
this
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situation the amount of air pollution and forest annihilation rise.
Whereas
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, the main ingredients that need communities to survive like meat, and so on that are produced by rural inhabitants are reduced.

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coherence and cohesion
Try to provide a clearer introduction that outlines the main points you will discuss in the essay. This will help set the stage for the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use a wider variety of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas logically. This will improve the flow of your essay.
task achievement
Enhance your arguments by including more detailed examples to support your claims. For instance, mention specific cities or countries affected by urban migration and its consequences.
task achievement
Be cautious with phrasing and word choice; for example, instead of 'put countries in famine situations', consider 'could lead to food shortages'. This will clarify your meaning.
task achievement
You clearly stated your opinion that the trend is a negative development, which sets a clear direction for your essay.
task achievement
Your essay discusses both environmental impacts and food production, showcasing a reasonable understanding of the topic in a balanced way.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-to-urban migration
  • population shift
  • positive impact
  • negative impact
  • urbanization
  • job opportunities
  • access to education
  • access to healthcare
  • urban infrastructure
  • rural traditions
  • cultural heritage
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