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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

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There is a common thought shared by some experts that children learn easily a different
language
Use synonyms
 when they are in primary school than
being
Verb problem
when they are
show examples
 in secondary school.
Although
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 it is true that acquiring new knowledge seems to be less complex when we are little, it doesn't mean it is not possible to learn afterwards. In my opinion, the earlier a kid starts learning a foreign
language
Use synonyms
, the better. The brain of a kid is more receptive to learning. As it is still growing, its ability to create new connections among neurons
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is greater. Experts usually define children as "sponges" because they absorb new content and knowledge very easily.
Furthermore
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, it has been proved that just
being
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by being
show examples
 exposed to a different
language
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, they are able to retain it without much difficulty. They can switch from one
language
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 to another depending on who they are talking to.
Although
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 at the beginning, they might experience a silent period, once they feel confident with both languages, they speak them indistinctively.
On the other hand
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, secondary students may find learning a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 harder. It depends on which
language
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, but pronunciation could be rather complex as their mouths are used to the way they produce sounds in their mother tongue. It will require more effort from them and some might even need to ask for help from a
language
Use synonyms
 speech specialist. Despite the pronunciation, they could achieve a good level in any
language
Use synonyms
 and they would be able to communicate with others. In conclusion, we need to consider that it would be better for children
to begin
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 learning a different
language
Use synonyms
 when they are very young as
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 brains are better prepared to do so.
However
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, there is no limit
of
Change preposition
to
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 age when it comes to
be
Change the verb form
being
show examples
 willing to learn.

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Task Achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to illustrate your points. For instance, you could mention specific studies or personal experiences related to language learning in early childhood.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on the clarity of your ideas. Some sentences could be clearer or better structured to enhance understanding. For example, the transition between points could be smoother.
Task Achievement
Make sure to appropriately elaborate on the disadvantages of learning a new language at a later age. This would help balance your argument and show a deeper analysis of the topic.
Task Achievement
You effectively introduced the topic and stated your opinion clearly, making it easy for the reader to understand your position.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your paragraphs are generally well-structured, with clear topic sentences introducing the main ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cognitive abilities
  • pronunciation
  • self-conscious
  • cultural awareness
  • global society
  • proficiency levels
  • competitive job market
  • foundational skills
  • qualified teachers
  • recreational activities
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