IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Students should spend a period of time studying and living in a different country to learn language and culture. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is undeniable that in
this
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 era of humanities education, life becomes more convenient in acquiring languages and cultures by travelling to foreign countries or learning in the same Region.
Overall
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, I assert that outcomes are more likely to be positive.
This
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 essay will highlight the benefits of
this
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 phenomenon to improve skills in languages, and will
also
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 provide relevant examples and insights. On the one hand, more and more learners prefer living in different nations because they demand to acquire new dialects. To illustrate more,
last
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 couple of years, numerous young people in my city travelled to China to learn the Chinese tongue.
Thus
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, we have already witnessed them develop their accent.
In addition
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, there are another positive
consequently
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 is that growth personality
due to
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 remoting. A clear example is a study at the University of Nizwa in 2023 showed that just above 85% of students who went to France, were more confident in dealing with different situations unlike learners who stayed at the same administration record for a quarter, and
also
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 felt blue and shy to talk the second language.
As a result
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,
this
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 way could Definitely improve the case.
Additionally
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, cultures play a crucial role in our lifestyle.
Moreover
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, teenagers enjoy studying multicultural because
this
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 event is a wonderful way to communicate with individuals.
Besides
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, learner declines problems with residents,
for example
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, Turkey's citizens have a strict at-night which says no one make noise or remove sofa in flats because they have a policy in
this
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 case. In conclusion, no doubt in
this
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 era of neck-to-neck competition, studying humanities majors in a variety of countries becomes highly important to explore these languages and cultures.
Therefore
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, these can be lessened by some immediate steps by the government and residents.

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task achievement
Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines your stance on the topic. Consider rephrasing it to explicitly state whether you agree or disagree, rather than simply suggesting many benefits.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs should be more clearly structured. Each main idea should have a topic sentence that clearly indicates what the paragraph will discuss.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points. While you mention young people traveling to learn Chinese, further details would strengthen your argument and make it more compelling.
coherence and cohesion
Be mindful of grammar and word usage for clarity. Phrases like 'more and more learners prefer' could be articulated more effectively. For instance, consider 'an increasing number of learners are choosing'.
content
You have a clear intention to discuss both language acquisition and cultural understanding, which is great as it shows a broad perspective on the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • immersion
  • cultural exchange
  • global diversity
  • critical thinking
  • intercultural communication
  • resilience
  • adaptability
  • professional networks
  • language proficiency
  • educational systems
What to do next:
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