IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Students should spend a period of time studying and living in a different country to learn language and culture. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some people think that young generations ought to spend a period of their life in
countries
Use synonyms
 to learn other languages and traditional norms. I subscribe to
this
Linking Words
 perspective owing to the
fact
Use synonyms
 that living in other
countries
Use synonyms
 improves individuals' skills in
communication
Use synonyms
 and work. On the one hand, when people have a chance to study in border areas, they learn new languages.
In other words
Linking Words
, they enhance their
communication
Use synonyms
 ability inasmuch as bilinguals provide an opportunity for the population to interact with more people.
For example
Linking Words
, if the Chinese live in the USA, they learn the English language and can interact with not only Chinese but
also
Linking Words
 the community who can speak English and their
communication
Use synonyms
 systems are enhanced.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
fact
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 really important is studying in foreign
countries
Use synonyms
 creates a cultural exchange system inasmuch as they can teach their culture and learn other social norms.
As a result
Linking Words
, they can establish international companies or work in these types of businesses and have more job opportunities because they know other cultures and how they behave with global employees.
For instance
Linking Words
, most international students find their work faster
due to
Linking Words
 the
fact
Use synonyms
 that they have employment opportunities either in their
countries
Use synonyms
 or in other areas around the world.
To sum up
Linking Words
, in my personal view,
this
Linking Words
 development has a positive influence on students on account of the
fact
Use synonyms
 that it develops the level of their
communication
Use synonyms
 when they become multilingual and provides more job opportunities or funds for their international businesses.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider providing a clearer thesis statement in the introduction that explicitly states your position and outlines your main points. This will help guide the reader through your argument more effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Work on making your paragraphs more cohesive by using a greater variety of linking words and phrases to improve flow and connections between ideas.
task achievement
Clarify some of your examples by providing more detailed explanations of how they relate to your main argument. This will strengthen the relevance of your examples and enhance your overall point.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the prompt effectively and presents a clear opinion on the topic.
task achievement
You've included relevant examples that support your main points, indicating a good understanding of cultural exchange and language learning.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • immersion
  • cultural exchange
  • global diversity
  • critical thinking
  • intercultural communication
  • resilience
  • adaptability
  • professional networks
  • language proficiency
  • educational systems
What to do next:
Look at other essays: