Currently there is a trend towards the use of alternative forms of medicine. However, at best these methods are ineffective, and at worst they may be dangerous. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

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Alternative
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medicine
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is not new. It is accepted that it pre-dates conventional
medicine
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and it is still used by many people all over the world. I am unconvinced that it is dangerous, and feel that both
alternative
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and conventional
medicine
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can be useful. There are several reasons why the conventional medical community is often dismissive of alternatives.
Firstly
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, there has been little scientific research into
such
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medicine
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, so there is a scarcity of evidence to support the claims of their supporters.
Furthermore
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, people often try
such
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treatment because of recommendations from friends, and
therefore
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come to the therapist with a very positive attitude, which may be part of the reason for the cure.
Moreover
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, these
therapies
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are usually only useful for long-term, chronic conditions. Acute medical problems,
such
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as accidental injury, often require more conventional methods.
On the other hand
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, there remain strong arguments for the use of alternatives. Despite the lack of scientific proof, there is a lot of anecdotal evidence to suggest that these
therapies
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work.
In addition
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, far from being dangerous, they often have few or no side effects, so the worst outcome would be no change. One of the strongest arguments for the effectiveness of
alternative
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therapies
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in the West is that, whilst conventional
medicine
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is available without charge, many people are prepared to pay considerable sums for alternatives. If they were totally unhelpful, it would be surprising if
this
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continued. I strongly believe that conventional
medicine
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and
alternative
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therapies
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can and should coexist. They have different strengths, and can both be used effectively to target particular medical problems. The best situation would be for
alternative
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therapies
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to be used to support and complement conventional
medicine
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.

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task achievement
Your introduction is clear and sets the stage for your argument well. However, you could enhance it by briefly outlining the main points you will discuss in the body of the essay. This would provide a clearer roadmap for the reader.
coherence and cohesion
While your essay demonstrates a good logical structure with clear paragraphs, some transitions between ideas could be smoother. Consider using more linking phrases to improve the flow between points, especially when countering arguments or introducing new ideas.
task achievement
Although you provide some relevant examples, including more specific case studies or data might strengthen your argument about the efficacy and safety of alternative medicine. Specific details often enhance the clarity of your ideas.
language
Your writing style is fluent, and your argument is clearly articulated with a strong opinion. This helps to engage the reader and makes your position unmistakable.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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