IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that all university students should be required to study abroad for at least one semester. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of such a policy.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Education abroad should be mandatory for university
students
Use synonyms
 for at least one term as suggested by many advocates.
While
Linking Words
 it can be
benificial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 to their career it can
also
Linking Words
 disrupt the flow of their learning.
Firstly
Linking Words
, studying abroad can be impactful to
students
Use synonyms
 who are looking for higher education.
Although
Linking Words
 many countries have great programs, most are not advanced enough for undergraduates to finish their
studies
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, offering them the chance to complete it can greatly benefit them and their home country. Since
students
Use synonyms
 who have gotten the
life changing
Add a hyphen
life-changing
show examples
oppotunity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
 often feel gratitude and want to come back and repay the
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
.
Thus
Linking Words
, improving the country in the
proceess
Correct your spelling
process
. It can be said that
over
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the majority of people who
help
Wrong verb form
helped
show examples
 shape Thailand went to other countries to finish their
studies
Use synonyms
. 
On the other hand
Linking Words
, many still think that it is a waste
time
Change preposition
of time
show examples
 as not all
universisty
Correct your spelling
university
students
Use synonyms
 need to study abroad. Even if the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 has enough money to support all scholars, the
languague
Correct your spelling
language
 barrier
is still be
Change the verb form
is still
show examples
 a widespread problem. With that in mind, sending these young people to a country with no family, friends and connections can be stressful for them. Since there will be all these new responsibilities for them to carry on top of their already burdenful
studies
Use synonyms
. Many have reported back, that being in an exchange program did not improve their
studies
Use synonyms
 as they expected, rather most of the time it was difficult to understand what people were trying to communicate. To sum it up, going abroad to study is brilliant
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the student and their
homecountry
Correct your spelling
home country
 as most
students
Use synonyms
 will likely come back.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, stress can build up from all the responsibility and it can worsen their
studies
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of helping
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your position in the introduction to enhance clarity. Consider rephrasing the thesis statement for better coherence.
task achievement
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and supports it with more specific examples. This will strengthen your argument and provide clearer insight into your points.
coherence and cohesion
Use transition words and phrases to better connect your ideas within and between paragraphs. This would improve the logical flow of your essay significantly.
coherence and cohesion
Review your spelling and grammatical errors, as they can affect the overall readability of your writing. For instance, correct 'benificial' to 'beneficial' and 'universisty' to 'university'.
idea development
You successfully identified both advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad, showing a balanced perspective on the topic.
idea development
Your conclusion summarizes your view on the policy effectively, reinforcing the main arguments presented.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: