IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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It is
Correct pronoun usage
Is
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 argued that learning a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 is the main purpose for
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 or working in a foreign country,
while
Linking Words
 others believe that these are not the only reasons to explain why
people
Use synonyms
 should learn a new
language
Use synonyms
. I believe that
while
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 speaking a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 can easily communicate with local
people
Use synonyms
, learning a new
language
Use synonyms
 is more important than enhancing
people
Use synonyms
’s competence. Some argue that the importance of learning a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 is a tool for
people
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 to understand others. The ability to speak a foreign
language
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 can help you to solve difficult problems
such
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 as when
people
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 are getting lost, without knowing simple local words that may increase the difficulty of seeking help from others.
For example
Linking Words
, In Indonesia, most Indonesians cannot speak or understand English,
therefore
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 knowing some local words can help
people
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 to get over the
language
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 barrier. Despite
this
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, I would argue that individuals learning a foreign
language
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 are not only for working or
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
. If
people
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 increase their
language
Use synonyms
 level it enhances their competence in their working place. Increasing a foreign
language
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 increases the chance of working with foreigners and expands individuals’ perspectives.
For example
Linking Words
, some international companies are more likely to develop their branches in other countries, if
people
Use synonyms
 who are fluent in certain languages have more chances to assign themselves to work overseas. I
therefore
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 believe that learning a new
language
Use synonyms
 is crucial for
people
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 to increase their competition in the workplace by equipping them to work in different countries. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 learning a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 can help them communicate with local citizens, I think that learning a new
language
Use synonyms
 enhances workers' ability to work overseas later in life.

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task achievement
The introduction could be clearer in establishing your main argument. Consider rephrasing your stance to make it directly responsive to the prompt.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea that ties back to your thesis. This will enhance the logical flow of your arguments.
task achievement
Try to connect the examples you give back to your main argument more explicitly to strengthen your points.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples to illustrate your points, which supports your arguments effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion summarizes your main ideas well, reiterating your stance clearly and effectively.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • multilingual
  • linguistic proficiency
  • globalized world
  • cross-cultural communication
  • immersive experience
  • adaptability
  • cultural exchange
  • interpersonal skills
  • employment prospects
  • empathy
  • intellectual development
  • overcome language barriers
  • global market
  • resourceful
  • life-changing
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