IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional food and traditional ways of food preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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With the rise of busy lifestyles,
people
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 started to prefer
convenience
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foods
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, leading some to believe they will eventually replace traditional
foods
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 and cooking methods.
While
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 I acknowledge the growing demand for processed and ready-to-eat
meals
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, I strongly disagree that they will completely replace traditional food practices. On the one hand,
convenience
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foods
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 offer practical benefits in modern society. They save time and effort, making them ideal for individuals with chaotic schedules.
Additionally
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, today's food technology,
improved
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improves
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 the nutritional quality of ready-made
meals
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,
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and provide
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provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
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 healthier options.
For instance
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, frozen and chopped vegetable mixes and pre-cooked grains allow
people
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 to prepare quick and nutritious
meals
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.
However
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, many
people
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 prefer home-cooked
meals
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due to
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 their freshness,
flavor
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flavour
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, and nutritional value.
Moreover
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, traditional cooking plays an essential role in family bonding and preserving cultural heritage. In countries like Italy and Turkey,
for example
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, preparing and sharing
meals
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 is a cherished tradition passed down through generations.
Furthermore
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, growing awareness of health risks associated with processed
foods
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,
such
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 as obesity and heart disease, has encouraged
people
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 to prioritize natural ingredients and homemade
meals
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. The popularity of home cooking shows and organic food trends suggests that traditional methods will continue to thrive alongside
convenience
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foods
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. In conclusion,
while
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convenience
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foods
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 will remain a significant part of modern life, they are unlikely to fully replace traditional cuisine and cooking methods.
Instead
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, both will exist, for different needs and preferences.

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task achievement
While your introduction sets the context and presents your viewpoint well, consider adding a brief outline of the points you will discuss. This can provide a stronger roadmap for the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs are logically structured, but ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence to improve clarity and focus on the main idea.
task achievement
While you provided relevant examples, expanding on them could enrich your argument and provide clearer support for your points, particularly concerning health risks and cultural traditions.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear viewpoint with a good balance of advantages and counterarguments, which shows critical thinking.
coherence and cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and reiterates your stance, providing closure to the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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