Social media has become a real problem for young people today, and governments should create law that allow only people over 18 years of age to have accounts. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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In today’s digital world, social
media
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has become a significant concern for young people, leading many to argue that access should be restricted to those over 18. I strongly agree with
this
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viewpoint, as excessive social
media
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use can cause cyberbullying, insecurity, and a distorted perception of reality. Teenagers should prioritize real-life experiences rather than spending excessive time online. Social
media
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exposure can lead to attention deficits, anxiety, and low self-esteem. Many young girls,
for instance
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, compare themselves to influencers and develop unrealistic expectations about beauty and lifestyle.
Additionally
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, cyberbullying is a growing issue. One well-documented case involved a teenager who resorted to drug abuse after being bullied for his slim physique. Since young minds are still developing, they often struggle to differentiate between online trends and reality, making them more vulnerable to manipulation and mental health issues.
Moreover
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, real-life interactions are essential for emotional and social development. Engaging in activities
such
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as sports fosters teamwork, discipline, and confidence, helping young people build valuable life skills. Research suggests that children with limited screen time develop better cognitive, emotional, and motor functions.
Although
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some argue that restrictions can be bypassed using VPNs or fake credentials, enforcing protective laws can still minimize harm. Governments should implement strict regulations, and parents must educate their children about responsible internet use and digital safety. In conclusion, social
media
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poses significant risks to young people. Legal restrictions, combined with parental guidance, can help protect teenagers from its negative effects and promote healthier development in the real world.

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task achievement
While your arguments are strong, consider adding more examples to reinforce your points. Explore different dimensions of the issue, such as the role of social media in communication skills or its educational potential.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. For instance, at the end of your second paragraph, a brief statement that connects the importance of real-life interactions back to the risks of social media could enhance flow.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction presents a clear position, and your conclusion effectively summarizes your stance.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples and evidence to support your claims, particularly regarding the effects of social media on mental health.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • mental health
  • unrealistic expectations
  • cyberbullying
  • maturity
  • long-term consequences
  • inappropriate content
  • predatory individuals
  • age restrictions
  • misrepresent
  • supportive communities
  • educational resources
  • technological literacy
  • digital citizenship
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