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Writing Samples
Band 7

In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. what are the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this?

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Nowadays, encouraging the young generation to choose a gap year has become a new trend. Most
people
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 suggest the young generation work or travel after graduating from high school.
This
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 essay will explain the advantages and disadvantages.
To begin
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 with, the trend to choose a gap year among young
people
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 has increased dramatically. Many young
people
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 tend to delay their
education
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 after graduating from high school. Most of them choose to explore new places. Travelling is one option for them to explore something new.
Furthermore
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, they can learn many things from travelling.
For instance
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, they can gain new knowledge, learn new cultures, meet new
people
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, and make connections with
people
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 around the world.
In addition
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, some young generations
also
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 choose to work before they decide to continue studying at university.
Moreover
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, they can consider what major is suitable for them if they choose to study at university.
In contrast
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, when young
people
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 tend to choose to delay
education
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, they are probably going to enjoy that decision, and they are not interested in continuing their studies.
For instance
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, young
people
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 apply for a job after graduating from high school, and they are busy working; they might consider
education
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 is not a priority anymore. In conclusion, a gap year for young
people
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 has advantages and disadvantages. One side will give them the opportunity to explore life and find something that interests them the most. On the other side, if they find something that attracts them, perhaps they will forget to continue studying in higher-level
education
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.

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task achievement
Consider providing more detailed examples to support your points, especially regarding the disadvantages of taking a gap year. This would enhance the depth of your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the flow of your ideas by using more varied transition words or phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs. This can help the reader follow your argument more smoothly.
task achievement
Ensure that all your main points are further elaborated upon. For example, when discussing how gap years can distract from further studies, you might include statistics or studies that highlight this issue.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which effectively presents your ideas.
task achievement
You provide a balanced view of both advantages and disadvantages, which demonstrates critical thinking about the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural immersion
  • Life experience
  • Work ethic
  • Career readiness
  • Self-discovery
  • Delayed gratification
  • Intellectual stagnation
  • Financial implications
  • Social dynamics
  • Academic trajectory
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