The only way to improve safety of our roads is to give much stricter punishments on driving offenses. To what extent do you agree with this idea?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Enhancing

drive

Use synonyms

safety needs stronger punishments towards offensive drivers.In

this

Linking Words

essay, I am going to convey my opinion with related examples. Nowadays we can see high-ranking

drive

Use synonyms

traffic accidents. Most of

happening

Wrong verb form

this happens

show examples

due to

Linking Words

driver misbehaviour,

such

Linking Words

as accidents on the pedastrioncross, fast driving beyond

Add an article

the

show examples

driving limit and overtaking between two vehicles in an unpropermaner.Some of

cases

Add an article

the cases

show examples

are recorded driver misbehaviour

such

Linking Words

as drug

addicted

Replace the word

addiction

show examples

, insufficient sleep, illegal driving licence without proper training, other than that related to the use of

low grade

Add a hyphen

low-grade

show examples

vehicles, insufficient driving training, lack of knowledge in

safty

Correct your spelling

safe

driving, navigation system and

drive

Use synonyms

map. In

this

Linking Words

situation

Add a comma

situation,

show examples

pedastrions

Correct your spelling

pedestrians

and vehicle owners have to face major issues related to health and finances.

Furthermore

Linking Words

increased the number of dead bodies and disabilities among the population.A government has to allocate more funds to empowering the quality of life of people who

suffered

Wrong verb form

suffer

show examples

Insurance

Add an article

The insurance

show examples

company

Fix the agreement mistake

companies

show examples

also

Linking Words

need to work towards

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

them.In most cases increased traffic congestion

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

may lead to drawbacks in the quality and quantity of work. To overcome these life-threatening situations need to improve our

drive

Use synonyms

system.To implement

this

Linking Words

may need to give strict punishment towards to offensive drivers. In my view , If

Add a verb

we are

we were

show examples

strict in punishment on driving offences we can reduce

Change the article

the

show examples

number of dead bodies ,

disable

Wrong verb form

disabled

show examples

communities regarding

Use synonyms

drive

Replace the word

driving

show examples

accidents

moreover

Linking Words

cutdown number of condemned vehicles.

anopatikiriFri Mar 14 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion

The introduction could be more engaging by providing a clearer statement of your position and a brief overview of the main points you will discuss.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that your paragraphs have clear topic sentences and that each paragraph focuses on one main idea to enhance clarity and coherence.

Task Achievement

Consider providing more specific examples and detailed explanations to support your points about the causes of traffic accidents and the benefits of stricter punishments.

Coherence and Cohesion

Be careful with spelling and grammar, as there are several errors that detract from the overall clarity of your essay. For example, 'pedastrioncross' should be 'pedestrian crossings'.

Task Achievement

You have identified a significant issue regarding road safety and have presented your opinion clearly.

Task Achievement

Your essay covers various aspects of driving offenses that impact road safety, showing some understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

223 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

punishment
driving offenses
road safety
deterrent
reckless driving
educational programs
law enforcement
consequences
infrastructure
public transportation
vehicle safety standards
substance abuse
traffic laws
dangerous driving habits
long-term effectiveness

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
With a fast pace of modern life more and more people are turning towards fast food for their meals. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
It is not unusual for people to choose more fast food as their meals nowadays. In my opinion, I support the view that the benefits of this phenomenon far outweigh its drawbacks.
7
band
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
6.5
band
Some people think that studying history is a waste of time while others think that it is essential to learn. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
While it is often thought that studying history is a waste of time, other people consider that learning history is indispensable. In my opinion, I believe that the second view is the best.
7
band
Some companies prefer people to work in the office, while others facilitate their employees to work from home. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Some enterprises are fond of having staff working in the office, while other employers assist subordinates to work from a distance. The idea of working from home appeals to me because it is not only economical for hirers but also gives more flexibility for employees.
6
band
You have recently left something in a train, write a letter to the manager of lost and found department and specify. • When you lost it • Describe the object you have left • Tell the manager what you want them to do with it
I am writing in connection with my lost camera while travelling form Shimla to Delhi last Tuesday. I would like to inform that I boarded Delhi Express early in the morning and placed my luggage near my seat number 451.During the journey, I had several bags with me including my camera case, which I forgot to take with me when I left the train at Delhi station. This is an urgent matter as being a professional photographer, it is hard for me to deliver photographs to my clients.

The only way to improve safety of our roads is to give much stricter punishments on driving offenses. To what extent do you agree with this idea?

Fully explain your ideas

With a fast pace of modern life more and more people are turning towards fast food for their meals. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Some people think that studying history is a waste of time while others think that it is essential to learn. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some companies prefer people to work in the office, while others facilitate their employees to work from home. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

You have recently left something in a train, write a letter to the manager of lost and found department and specify. • When you lost it • Describe the object you have left • Tell the manager what you want them to do with it