Some people think that modern life is generally close to the ideal, while others think it needs to be significantly improved. What is your opinion?

The quality of modern
life
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has sparked considerable debate, with some viewing it as nearly perfect
while
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others believe substantial improvements are necessary.
Although
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contemporary society has achieved remarkable progress in many areas, I firmly believe that modern
life
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requires significant enhancement, particularly in terms of mental well-being and environmental sustainability. The primary reason supporting my view is the alarming deterioration of mental
health
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in developed societies. Despite unprecedented material prosperity, rates of depression, anxiety, and suicide have skyrocketed in recent decades. The constant pressure to succeed, social media comparison culture, and lack of meaningful human connections have created a mental
health
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crisis.
For instance
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, countries like South Korea and Japan, despite their economic success, report some of the highest suicide rates globally, suggesting that material advancement alone cannot guarantee
life
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satisfaction.
Furthermore
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, modern
life
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's environmental impact poses serious threats to future generations. Our current lifestyle, characterized by excessive consumption, fossil fuel dependence, and waste production, is rapidly depleting natural resources and accelerating climate change. The consequences are already visible through extreme weather events, rising sea levels, and biodiversity loss. Cities like Beijing and Delhi regularly experience hazardous air pollution levels, directly affecting citizens'
health
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and quality of
life
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.
While
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I acknowledge that modern
life
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offers significant advantages
such
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as advanced healthcare, educational opportunities, and technological conveniences, these benefits are often unevenly distributed and come at considerable costs. Many people work longer hours than previous generations, struggle with work-
life
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balance, and feel increasingly disconnected from their communities despite being more "connected" digitally. In conclusion,
although
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modern
life
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has brought undeniable improvements in certain aspects, the rising mental
health
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issues and environmental degradation indicate that significant reforms are essential to
create
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creating
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truly ideal living conditions for current and future generations.

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Task Achievement
Consider adding more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. For instance, provide statistics or studies regarding mental health or environmental issues.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to include more linking words or phrases to help the flow of ideas. For example, use words like 'firstly', 'additionally', or 'on the other hand'.
Task Achievement
You present clear main ideas and a strong opinion throughout the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively summarize your position and main points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • adherents
  • predictability
  • responsibilities
  • productivity
  • reduces stress
  • eliminating
  • prioritize
  • spontaneity
  • creativity
  • rigid
  • explore new opportunities
  • adapt to unexpected situations
  • personal growth
  • fulfilling life
  • general structure
  • efficiency
  • predictability
  • creativity
  • adaptability
  • structured routine
  • maintaining order
  • flexibility
  • exploration
  • unpredictability
  • balanced approach
  • professional growth
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