IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience

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HERE THE ESSAY SPECIFIES
ABOUT
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THE
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LIFE'S
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LIVES
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 OF
THE
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UNIVERSITY
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STUDENTS
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 AT HOME AND
ON
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OTHER HAND THEY ARE ATTENDING
UNIVERSITY
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 IN ANOTHER
CITY
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. AS WE ALL ARE SEEING
IN
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NOW-A-DAYS
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NOWADAYS
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THE
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EDUCATION PLAYS A VITAL ROLE IN
EVERY ONE'S
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EVERYONE'S
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LIFE
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 THAT THEY ARE ACHIEVING
THERE
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THEIR
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LIFE
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 GOALS BY STUDYING ,BUT THE MAIN THING IS IN SOME COUNTRIES
UNIVERSITY
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STUDENTS
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 LIVE AT HOME WITH
THERE
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THEIR
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 FAMILY
WHILE
Linking Words
 THEY STUDY ,
WHILE
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 IN OTHER COUNTRIES THE
STUDENTS
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 ATTEND
UNIVERSITY
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 IN ANOTHER
CITY
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 AS WE SEE THAT THE
STUDENTS
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 WHO ARE LIVING WITH FAMILY WILL GET SOME BENIFITS AND THE
STUDENTS
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 ATTENDING THE
UNIVERSITY
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 IN
ANOTHER CITIES
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ANOTHER CITY
OTHER CITIES
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 WILL GET SOME
BENIFITS
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BENEFITS
. THE
STUDENTS
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 LIVING WITH THEIR FAMILY
WHILE
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 STUDYING WILL LEARN NUMEROUS ETHICS,ECONOMICS AND RESPECT
TO
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FOR
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 OTHERS AND THEY WILL LEAD A HAPPY
LIFE
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 WITHIN
GOOD
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A GOOD
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 ENVIRONMENT WITH PERFECTION
AND
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THEY WILL MAINTAIN DISCIPLINE AND BUILD SOME INTERPERSONAL SKILLS ,
WHILE
Linking Words
STUDENTS
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 ATTEND
UNIVERSITY
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 IN
ANOTHER CITIES
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ANOTHER CITY
OTHER CITIES
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 LEARN HOW TO CONSUME THERE MONEY FOE THERE
LIFE
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 EXPENSES AND THEY CAME TO KNOW HOW TO CONTRIBUTE THERE MONEY IN APPROPRIATE MANNER AND THEY IMPROVE COMMUNICATION SKILLS WITH THE DIFFERENT CATEGORY OF
PEOPLE
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. AS I AM A
UNIVERSITY
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 STUDENT THAT I AM ATTENDING THE
UNIVERSITY
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 IN ANOTHER
CITY
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 ,
HERE
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 I
IMPROVE
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HAVE IMPROVED
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 MY COMMUNICATION WITH DIFFERENT LINGUISTS AND I CAME TO KNOW HOW TO BEHAVE PROPERLY WITH OTHERS AND HOW
MANAGE
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TO MANAGE
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THE
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FINANCIAL CRISES DURING
THE
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MY
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COLLEAGE
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COLLEGE
 DAYS
AND
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HERE I
MADE
Verb problem
HAVE
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 A STRONG GROUP OF
PEOPLE
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 WITH WELL MANNERED ATTITUDE WHICH HELPS ME TO SUCCEED IN
LIFE
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 . AS A
UNIVERSITY
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 STUDENT I HAVE TO COMMUNICATE WITH THE
PEOPLE
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 IN ALL OVER THE WORLD WHERE I AM NOT AWARE
ABOUT
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OF
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 THE
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PEOPLE
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PEOPLE'S
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 BEHAVIOUR WITHOUT ANY HELP
OF
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FROM
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 FAMILY SO, THE
LIFE
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 OF THE STUDENT WHO IS ATTENDING
UNIVERSITY
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 IN ANOTHER
CITY
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 GET NUMEROUS 
BENIFITS
Correct your spelling
BENEFITS
.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use clear topic sentences for each paragraph to clearly state your main idea.
task achievement
Try to elaborate on the points you make, providing more detailed examples or explanations to support your thoughts.
grammar and language
Pay attention to punctuation, spelling, and grammatical errors to enhance clarity.
coherence and cohesion
Consider adding a conclusion that summarizes your points and clearly states your stance.
task achievement
You have identified the advantages of both living at home and studying away, which shows a balanced approach to the question.
task achievement
Your personal experience provides a unique perspective that adds authenticity to your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • self-reliance
  • finance management
  • exposure
  • broaden horizons
  • open-minded
  • adaptability
  • conducive environment
  • isolation
  • homesickness
  • financial burden
  • household duties
  • academic responsibilities
  • personal growth
What to do next:
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