IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Today many teenagers rely greatly on technology when learning. Is this a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, a
lot
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 of
students
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 mostly use technology when they are studying. From my
prespective
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perspective
, it is a positive
improvment
Correct your spelling
improvement
 as technology helps
students
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 in learning. They are providing a
lot
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 of resources and
helps
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help
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students
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 to do self-
study
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. One major positive side of
this
Linking Words
,
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apply
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 is that
internet
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the internet
show examples
provide
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provides
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 a
lot
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 of resources to
study
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. With the development of
the
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apply
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technology, today
in
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on
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 the internet a
lot
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 of videos, online courses, articles and apps. It
is
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apply
show examples
helps
to
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apply
show examples
students
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 to
study
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 again, if something was hard to understand
at
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apply
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the first
time
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 with a teacher.
Moreover
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, it did not
spend
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waste
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students
Check wording
students'
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time
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to search
Wrong verb form
searching for
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right
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the right
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 materials for
study
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 and
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
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 money to buy books.
For example
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, it is not necessary to find books in the library and buy
it&nbsp
Correct your spelling
them
;
Punctuation problem
apply
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 as
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
 everything
at
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in
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the
Correct article usage
a
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 short period of
time
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 with
the
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apply
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many resources. Many educational websites help
students
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 to revise materials and improve their memory without relying on teachers.  Another important point is that with
coming
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the coming
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 modern
technologies
Punctuation problem
technologies,
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students
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 can
study
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 themselves. It helps to
study
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independly
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independently
 without relying on teachers and tutors.
This
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improve
Correct subject-verb agreement
improves
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responsibilities&nbsp
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responsibilities
;
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 and critical thinking.
Linking Words
This
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These
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 skills will help
students
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 to achieve goals and results that they want.
Although
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 there are some disadvantages as visual impairment and problems with the spine. But it can be prevented if
students
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will
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apply
show examples
remember the rules of computer use
like
Punctuation problem
, like
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 limiting screen
time
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 and taking regular breaks.  In conclusion, even though there are problems with
the
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apply
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health,
it
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they
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 can be avoided if
students
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will
Verb problem
apply
show examples
follow the rules. I think
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 it is a positive development since it saves
students
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time
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 and money,
also
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help
Wrong verb form
helps
show examples
 to
study
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 independently. 

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task response
State your view clearly in the first part and restate it at the end. Add one strong point with a simple example in each paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Use clear and short sentences. Link ideas with simple words so the order is easy to follow.
task response
You show an opinion and give reasons.
coherence cohesion
There is an attempt to use paragraphs and linking words like Moreover and For example.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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