IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

ome people want governments to spend money looking for life on other planets. Others, however, think this is a waste of public money when there are so many problems on earth. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The search for
life
Use synonyms
 on other planets is an ongoing debate, with some advocating for government funding in
space
Use synonyms
 exploration,
while
Linking Words
 others believe that
such
Linking Words
 expenditures should be directed towards pressing
issues
Use synonyms
 on
Earth
Use synonyms
. Both perspectives hold valid arguments, which I will discuss before presenting my own opinion. On one hand, investing in the search for alien
life
Use synonyms
 has the potential to bring numerous scientific advancements.
Space
Use synonyms
 exploration has historically led to significant technological innovations,
such
Linking Words
 as satellite communication, GPS, and medical imaging.
Additionally
Linking Words
, discovering extraterrestrial
life
Use synonyms
 could help answer fundamental questions about our existence and the possibility of habitable planets beyond
Earth
Use synonyms
, which could be crucial for humanity's long-term survival.
For example
Linking Words
, NASA’s Mars missions have not only expanded our understanding of the universe but have
also
Linking Words
 inspired new technological developments that benefit society.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, many argue that government funds should prioritize urgent
issues
Use synonyms
 like poverty, healthcare, and climate change. Billions of people around the world suffer from a lack of basic necessities, and spending vast amounts of money on interplanetary research may seem unjustifiable when these problems persist.
For instance
Linking Words
, addressing climate change requires immediate attention, as environmental degradation poses a direct threat to
life
Use synonyms
 on
Earth
Use synonyms
. Critics believe that governments should first solve problems at home before seeking
life
Use synonyms
elsewhere
Linking Words
. In my opinion, a balanced approach is necessary.
While
Linking Words
 I agree that tackling global
issues
Use synonyms
 should be a priority,
space
Use synonyms
 research should not be entirely neglected. Governments can allocate a reasonable portion of their budgets to
space
Use synonyms
 exploration
while
Linking Words
 ensuring that pressing
issues
Use synonyms
 on
Earth
Use synonyms
 receive adequate funding.
This
Linking Words
 way, humanity can progress in both scientific discovery and social development.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response
You have presented a well-structured argument that effectively discusses both views on the topic. However, consider adding more elaboration to your points to strengthen your argument further.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay flows logically and ideas are presented coherently. To improve coherence further, you could use more linking phrases to connect your ideas smoothly, especially between paragraphs.
Task Response
Your introduction clearly outlines the topic and presents the two sides of the argument, setting a solid foundation for your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your conclusion nicely summarizes your position and highlights the need for balance, which strengthens your overall argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: