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Writing Samples
Band 6

I'm writing an IELTS essay for this question: Some people think that newspapers are the best way to get news. However, others believe that they can get news better through another media platform. Discuss both views.

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Recently, social
media
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 apps have become popular and used everywhere around the
world
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,
this
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 fact has led some individuals to argue whether
newspapers
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 are still the preferred approach to getting
news
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. Some people believe that obtaining
news
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 through social
media
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 is the optimal way. In
this
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 essay, both perspectives will be discussed. On the one hand, the use of social
media
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such
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 as Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook is getting more popular year after year, and the majority of society is relying on them to get
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world's
Correct article usage
the world's
show examples
 latest
news
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. A recent study found that the sales of
newspapers
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 decreased from 60 per cent to 20 per cent in 2019.
This
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 highlights the transformation of approaching
news
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 in recent years.
For instance
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, Twitter publishes
news
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 faster than any other app, and a lot of people rely mainly on Twitter to know the
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world
Change noun form
world's
show examples
 incidents lately.
On the other hand
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, the elderly are used to buying
newspapers
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 and they are not familiar with the new ways to read the
news
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. It is difficult for them to transform with community trends . To illustrate, an old person who lived his whole life depending on a certain way of doing something will face a challenge to change that regardless of whether it is easy or hard to do so.
To conclude
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, it is argued what is the prime approach to obtain the latest
world
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news
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. Social
media
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 can be the best
due to
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 its popularity
as well as
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 its quickness.
However
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, old people still depend on the traditional way which is through
newspapers
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.

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Task Achievement
Try to include more detailed examples that are relevant to your arguments. For instance, when discussing social media's popularity, you can reference specific demographics or events that highlight its impact.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider adding transitional phrases between the points to enhance the logical flow of your ideas. This will help your reader follow your argument more easily.
Coherence and Cohesion
Expand on some of your ideas. For instance, you could elaborate more on the reasons behind the elderly's preference for newspapers and how this might change in the future.
Task Achievement
You've presented both sides of the argument, which is essential for this task. This demonstrates an understanding of the prompt and the need for balance.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction is clear and sets up the discussion well, which helps engage the reader from the beginning.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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