Some people spend a lot of money on tickets to go to sporting or cultural events. Do you think this is positive or negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

In today's society, some people spend considerable expenses to attend entertainment events, especially sports or cultural festivals. I believe

this

Linking Words

phenomenon marks a positive development in societal life

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

since it contributes to driving the economy and supports creative industries' growth. The following essay will elaborate on the detailed reasons. First and foremost, the disbursement will stimulate economic sectors by bringing positive impacts to other businesses and governments.

For instance

Linking Words

, the people will tend to allocate some additional expenses,

such

Linking Words

as transportation, meals, hotel, or merchandise to support their event attendance, meaning that the other business

also

Linking Words

takes advantage of

this

Linking Words

situation.

Additionally

Linking Words

, governments

also

Linking Words

experience economic gains as they collect value-added and income tax from most transactions and eventually, the governments might obtain more income to finance their agendas. Another key point is that the habit of entertainment spending will

also

Linking Words

bring benefits since various creative industry parties will interpret it as a good signal that they are being supported.

For instance

Linking Words

, the producers, promotors, or artists will feel appreciated by society, giving them more spirit to produce more attractive showcases in the future.

Moreover

Linking Words

, it

also

Linking Words

leads to more productivity in

this

Linking Words

business since the disbursement indicates that the entertainment market is growing.

Hence

Linking Words

, the players in

this

Linking Words

industry perceive it as an opportunity to sell more products which should be fully optimized. In conclusion, people nowadays tend to have additional expenses beyond their primary needs as they love to watch sports or art festivals. Despite the high cost, I strongly agree that

this

Linking Words

habit outweighs its disadvantages since it stimulates economic growth

as well as

Linking Words

supports the expansion of creative industries.

chrstnainggolanWed Mar 19 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

While your introduction is clear and presents your viewpoint effectively, you might elaborate more on the significance of the positive impacts of entertainment spending. This can enhance the depth of your essay.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure your paragraphs transition smoothly, making it easier for the reader to follow your line of reasoning. Using linking phrases could improve this aspect further.

task achievement

Consider providing specific examples in your points to support your claims more robustly, which would strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a well-defined structure, with a coherent introduction, body, and conclusion, which makes it easy to follow and understand.

task achievement

You effectively argue that spending on entertainment benefits the economy and the creative industry, showcasing clear ideas and arguments.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

273 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Do you think consumer should avoid over packed products or is it the responsibility of producers to avoid extra over packing products? Give your view or any relevant example with your own experiences.
Nowadays, the trend of using readily available goods in daily life is increasing enormously along which the methods of packaging items and their presentation play a vital role in luring customers and making insane profits. The use of different materials for wrapping products is done mostly by companies to ensure attractiveness and sell items on first hand whereas consumers are only concerned with their benefits. People often argue whether producers should avoid overpacking or the individuals who use them should be discarded , in my perspective, we as users should be responsible for avoiding such activities.
6
band
In the past, knowledge was stored in books. Today, people stored knowledge on the internet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
In the previous decade, people captured knowledge in books. However, in today's digital age, most individuals believe that knowledge is contained on the social networking site. It is the writer who strongly supports that the benefits of a variety of valuable knowledge and constant access to information on the internet far outweigh the drawbacks of illegal and misleading information.
6.5
band
Theoretical subjects (such as mathematic and philosophy) should no longer be taught in universities because most of university students choose practical subjects (such as accounting and economics).To what extent do you agree or disagree?
These days, there has been an increase in the number of people who pay attention to the issue of college education. It is said that the theory courses no longer need to exist, just because of their small popularity. Personally, I strongly disagree with this idea and reasons will be provided in this essay.
6.5
band
Working abroad can help employees earn a great deal of money and gain more benefits. However, some people think this trend has many negative impacts.
In our modern world, the number of internationally mobilized workers has increased expeditiously in recent years. While there are obvious benefits for those employees such as acquiring valuable experiences and improving their financial resources, there are severe ramifications on the local economy like the shortage of skilled workers and (brain drain) in many developing countries.
6.5
band
Some people think that some subjects such as mathematics and philosophy are too difficult for children to learn at school. They think that these subjects should be made optional rather than compulsory. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Education is the basis of Children's knowledge and intellectual power. There is a debatable argument between a group of people as they believe subjects like Calculus and Humanities should not be mandatory in learning institutions because they are tough concepts to retain for children. I totally disagree with this statement, In my opinion these courses make life easier and benefit in every aspect of life. Let us discuss the views in the following paragraphs.

Some people spend a lot of money on tickets to go to sporting or cultural events. Do you think this is positive or negative development?

Do you think consumer should avoid over packed products or is it the responsibility of producers to avoid extra over packing products? Give your view or any relevant example with your own experiences.

In the past, knowledge was stored in books. Today, people stored knowledge on the internet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Theoretical subjects (such as mathematic and philosophy) should no longer be taught in universities because most of university students choose practical subjects (such as accounting and economics).To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Working abroad can help employees earn a great deal of money and gain more benefits. However, some people think this trend has many negative impacts.

Some people think that some subjects such as mathematics and philosophy are too difficult for children to learn at school. They think that these subjects should be made optional rather than compulsory. To what extent do you agree or disagree?