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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The percentage of electricity production by fuel source in France in 1990 and 2020. Korkem.

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Percentage of
Electricity
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Production
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 by Fuel Source in France in 1990 and 2010.
Electricity
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production
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 is a key factor in economic growth and environmental sustainability. Over time, countries adapt their
energy
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 policies to reduce dependence on fossil fuels and increase renewable and nuclear
energy
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sources
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. The
provided
Verb problem
apply
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pie charts illustrate the percentage of
electricity
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production
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 by fuel source in France in 1990 and 2010. In 1990, France’s
electricity
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 generation was relatively diverse. Coal and nuclear
power
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 were the two dominant
sources
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, each contributing 28% to the total
electricity
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production
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. Natural gas accounted for 22%,
while
Linking Words
 oil and
hydro
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hydropower
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power
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 made up 17% and 6%, respectively.
This
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 mix suggests that fossil fuels played a crucial role in
energy
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production
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 at the time. By 2010, there was a dramatic shift towards nuclear
power
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. It became the dominant
energy
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 source, generating 67% of the total
electricity
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.
This
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 substantial increase reflects France’s long-term investment in nuclear
energy
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 to reduce carbon emissions and ensure
energy
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 security. Meanwhile, the share of coal decreased significantly to 13%, and oil declined even
further
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 to just 2%, indicating a move away from high-carbon
energy
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sources
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. The proportion of
hydro
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hydropower
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power
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 remained relatively stable at 13%,
while
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 natural gas saw a decline to 4%. The comparison between 1990 and 2010 highlights France’s commitment to cleaner and more efficient
energy
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sources
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. The most notable change is the rise of nuclear
power
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, replacing coal and oil as the primary
sources
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 of
electricity
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.
This
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 transition aligns with global trends of reducing fossil fuel dependency to mitigate climate change. If
this
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 trend continues, France may
further
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 develop renewable
energy
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sources
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,
such
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 as wind and solar
power
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, to complement its nuclear
energy
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 strategy.

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Task Achievement
The essay provides a clear and informative overview of the data presented in the pie charts. However, consider using more varied vocabulary to make your argument more engaging.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that you double-check your data consistency, as the years mentioned in the introduction and conclusion differ (1990 and 2010 vs 2020). A brief summary or concluding thoughts could enhance the conclusion.
Task Achievement
The essay effectively discusses the significant changes in France’s electricity production between 1990 and 2010, highlighting key trends in energy sources.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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