IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

It is often argued by many that historical objects should be returned to their country of origin. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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There are a lot of ancient goods around the world
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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some of them are in their own
countries
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 and some others are not in their selves
countries
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. It is common that some
countries
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 have an argument about
transfering
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transferring
 historical
objects
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 to
theirown
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their own
 regions. In my view,
although
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 sending the old
manufactureds
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manufactured
manufactures
manufacturers
 to the main region is not simple, it is necessary that most of them are returned to their modern home. I will explain in
this
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 essay why it is better that
historcal
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historical
objects
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 come back to their own territory. Returning the old
valueable
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valuable
objects
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 from the host region to their
origions
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origins
 has several benefits for
ancient
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the ancient
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and
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apply
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culture of the local residents.
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First
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, it can improve
tourism
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the tourism
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 industry in the
teritorry
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territory
.
Transfer
Wrong verb form
Transferring
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 these goods to the museums of
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this
Correct determiner usage
these
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countries
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 can
attrect
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attract
 many tourists to
visits
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visit
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of
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apply
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these things so
tourism
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the tourism
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 industry of
modern
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the modern
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 country will be improved.
Second,
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the
exist
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exit
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 of old valuable
objects
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 in each area shows
its
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the
show examples
 culture, history and customs of past
individuald
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individuals
individual
 in
this
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 part of
world
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the world
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.
For example
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, in the museums of
Iran
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Iran,
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 there are a lot of old
hand made
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handmade
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objects
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 like dishes, bowls and jewelleryes that
comes
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come
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form
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from
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 ancient
of
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apply
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Iran and tell to observer about how the past people lived with
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this
Correct determiner usage
these
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objects
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.
As a result
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, old valuable
objects
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 should return to their
first
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countries
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 and show
culture
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the culture
show examples
 of the people of these regions and increase the rate of tourists.
Although
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 returning the historical object to their
first
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territoty
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territory
 is a good idea, it is possible that some of these products will be destroyed
due to
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 the lack of
transfring
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transferring
faccilities
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facilities
.
For example
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, most of these
objects
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 are so
sensetive
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sensitive
 because of their age and if they do not have a suitable condition
in
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for
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transfering
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transferring
 and collecting like
temperture
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temperature
, pressure,
moisture
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and moisture
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 may be damaged and destroyed.
However
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,
with
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by
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prepering
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preparing
 the
equipments
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equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
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of
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to
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protect
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protecting
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 against
damaging
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damage
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 it will
be solve
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be solved
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. In conclusion, There are always some arguments that the old
obgects
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objects
object
 should come back to their
first
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 country. I believe, existing the old valuable
objects
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 in their own regions is beneficial for the host country and, local individuals and
tuorism
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tourism
industy
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industry
.

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language
Make sure to proofread for spelling and grammatical errors. Phrases like 'transfering' should be spelled as 'transferring', and 'historcal' should be 'historical'.
structure
Ensure that your paragraphs are well-structured with clear topic sentences and supporting details, which will enhance clarity in presenting ideas.
content
Consider providing more specific examples to strengthen your arguments further and make your points more compelling.
positive
You have a clear opinion in your introduction, which is important for the task.
positive
You make relevant points about the benefits of returning historical objects, which is a key aspect of the topic.
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