IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

It is thought by some that is better to live in a city while others believe it is better to live in the countryside. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that living in the
city
Use synonyms
 is beneficial for individuals, others argue that life in the countryside is considerably better.
While
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 I acknowledge the idea of living in the countryside is more peaceful, I believe that residing in the
city
Use synonyms
 will provide greater advantages.
To begin
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 with, there are various benefits for
people
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 who live in the
city
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.
Firstly
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, the
city
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 centre provides many choices of public transportation.
For example
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,
people
Use synonyms
 can easily access
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
skytrains, undergrounds or buses which can allow them to live conveniently. Another positive point is,
individuals
Correct word choice
that individuals
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 tend to have
a
Correct article usage
apply
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better job
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
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 since most well-known and big companies are located in the
city
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.
Moreover
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, a better healthcare system is
also
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 one of the advantages. Cities offer private hospitals where they have specialized doctors and advanced medical equipment. These support a higher standard and faster treatment options.
On the other hand
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, living in the countryside provides a better quality of
living
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life
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 for several reasons. The first thing
people
Use synonyms
 benefit from living outside of the
city
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 is a peaceful environment. Rural areas are less crowded and provide you
a
Add the preposition
with a
show examples
stress-free lifestyle.
In addition
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,
people
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 can save more money
due to
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 the lower cost of living compared to the
city
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.
For instance
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, the cost of rent, food and utilities is significantly lower in urban areas.
Furthermore
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, living closer to the nature in suburbs allows them to have a variety of options for outdoor activities
such
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hiking
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as hiking
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, diving and camping. In conclusion,
although
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 living in the
suburb
Fix the agreement mistake
suburbs
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 provides more quality of life in a peaceful environment, I firmly believe that life in the
city
Use synonyms
 offers a convenient lifestyle and
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
better opportunities.

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task achievement
While the essay covers both views adequately, providing more specific examples for each point would strengthen your arguments. For instance, you could mention specific cities that offer great job opportunities or specific outdoor activities available in the countryside.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph smoothly transitions from one idea to the next. For example, when discussing the countryside, a more explicit connection to how that contrasts with city living would enhance the flow of ideas.
task achievement
The introduction clearly outlines both perspectives and states your opinion, which is a strong start for any essay.
coherence and cohesion
The essay effectively highlights the advantages of both living environments, showcasing a balanced view on the topic.
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