IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Being a celebrity, such as a famous film star or sports personality, brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is said that being a
celebrity
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
 as a popular film star or sports personality, brings problems
as well as
Linking Words
 benefits.
Although
Linking Words
 earning huge amounts of salary is an advantage for celebrities, I am more convinced that getting
lots
Use synonyms
 of hatred is the major problem that outweighs the benefit. Being a well-known
celebrity
Use synonyms
,
for instance
Linking Words
, an actor
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 is not an easy achievement as it requires you to have good acting skills,
as well as
Linking Words
 knowledge to ensure that you have met the standard requirements of becoming a good actor.
However
Linking Words
, it is indeed profoundly rewarding for them as they get a huge amount of money in return for entertaining the audiences. Take ,
for example
Linking Words
, Tom Cruise, who is a professional actor and is known for his dedication
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 doing his own stunts during sets as he is
well trained
Add a hyphen
well-trained
show examples
 in various martial arts.
As a result
Linking Words
, he earns a lot of money for being able to express his own skills in the form of martial arts in his popular movie called "Mission Impossible". The major drawback of being a
celebrity
Use synonyms
 is you get
lots
Use synonyms
 of hate for your mistakes. People tend to gravitate towards the mistakes that you have made rather than what you have achieved as they find it entertaining.
As a result
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 could diminish your confidence,
hence
Linking Words
, reducing your capability in pursuing your career with
such
Linking Words
 talents.
For instance
Linking Words
, Tun Mahathir, who was the former president of Malaysia back in the early 2000s, received
lots
Use synonyms
 of hate from the citizens for not serving his responsibility as a president in the country, but what people don't see is that he has done
lots
Use synonyms
 of sacrifices for the sake of his own country. In conclusion, I think the primary problem of being a
celebrity
Use synonyms
 is they will receive a lot of hate for the mistakes that they have made in the past, and
this
Linking Words
 overshadows the benefits of earning a huge amount of money as a
celebrity
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Expand on your ideas with more specific examples to strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure smoother transitions between your ideas and paragraphs for better flow.
task achievement
Clarify the closing argument in your conclusion to make your stance more impactful.
task achievement
Strong introduction that clearly states your position on the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Well-structured paragraphs with distinct main points.
task achievement
Good use of specific examples to support your claims.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Public scrutiny
  • Intrusive
  • Endorsements
  • Sponsorships
  • Financial security
  • High-profile collaborations
  • Social influence
  • Philanthropic efforts
  • Trust issues
  • Mental health challenges
  • Substance abuse
  • Pressures of celebrity
  • Expectations
  • Disconnect from reality
  • Normalcy
What to do next:
Look at other essays: