IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, while others feel that crime is being tackled effectively now. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

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There is no doubt
in
Change preposition
that
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 these days
crime
Use synonyms
 is one of the
most
Correct word choice
biggest
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 issues that face any community. The question is, should we
have
Verb problem
take
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 more action to prevent
crime
Use synonyms
 or not
.
Change the punctuation
?
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 In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
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i'm
Change the capitalization
I'm
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 going to discuss the two sides and draw my conclusion. In terms of taking more actions, there
is
Change the verb form
are
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 great efforts from the
goverments
Correct your spelling
governments
government
 to prevent crimes inside our community, but
this
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 does not mean
its
Correct your spelling
it's
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 enough because there
some
Add a missing verb
are some
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 societies that have
high
Add an article
a high
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 percentage of kidnapping and theft.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
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this
Linking Words
coming
Wrong verb form
comes
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 from their low education level,
nevertheless
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
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low income
is
Verb problem
has
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high
Correct article usage
a high
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 impact
for
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on
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this
Linking Words
 issue.
However
Linking Words
, in the
wealthies
Correct your spelling
wealthiest
show examples
nations
Add a comma
nations,
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 they have effective action against crimes in their
socity
Correct your spelling
society
city
.
Because
Add the preposition
Because of
show examples
the
Change the word
their
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 high income
that let
Verb problem
,
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 their
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
to charge
Change the verb form
charges
show examples
 them
with
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apply
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large
Change the article
a large
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amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
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 of taxes.
Linking Words
Nevertheless
Add a comma
Nevertheless,
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this
Linking Words
 led to
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
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 the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
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 on police
staions
Correct your spelling
stations
 around the country.
Also
Linking Words
 if there low percentage in the unemployment group
this
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 will decrease any theft or
crime
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, the nature of the country will decide if they have to
provide
Verb problem
take
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 more action to decrease
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
crime
Use synonyms
. There
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
I believe,
everey
Correct your spelling
every
 nation would have
Correct article usage
a diffirent
show examples
diffirent
Correct your spelling
different
 solution than the other one but the main important thing to have is: high income
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 their citizens, spent large amount of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
taxes on police
staions
Correct your spelling
stations
 and to increase
their
Change preposition
in their
show examples
 education levels.

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Introduction
Ensure that your introduction provides a clearer outline of what you will discuss in the essay. Consider rephrasing your thesis statement to make it more specific and impactful.
Cohesion
Make sure to use transition words and phrases to improve the flow between your ideas—this will help in connecting sentences and paragraphs more logically.
Supporting details
While you have made some valid points, try to provide specific examples or evidence to support your arguments about crime prevention measures.
Balanced Argument
You have identified both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach to the topic.
Conclusion
Your conclusion reflects your opinion and summarizes the key points discussed in the essay, which is essential in academic writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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