Some people think all lawbreakers should be put into prison, while others believe that there are better alternatives. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

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Nowadays, It is argued by some people that any criminal

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

to be sent to jail when he or she commits a crime

while

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others believe that different measures should be used. In

this

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essay

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essay,

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I will look into both views and give my own opinion on the matter in detail. On the one hand, people in favour of sending offenders to

prison

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have valid reasons for that.

Firstly

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, it might be said that

Remove the comma

apply

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prison

Use synonyms

special

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a special

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facility that

urge

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urges

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criminals to understand and feel

results

Correct article usage

the results

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of their wrong actions.

In other words

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, restrictions, limitations and strict rules demotivate

law breakers

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lawbreakers

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to re-offend.

For example

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one of

the

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apply

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my relatives who served time in

prison

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does not want to go back there. After release he

choice

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chose

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life without a crime.

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Secondly

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Secondly,

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modern jails have training programs aimed at training inmates to acquire professions.

That is

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to say, they have a good opportunity to learn about

job

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jobs

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that will change their aims and outlook

while

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doing time behind bars. Take

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Japan as an example, in there,

according to

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statistics 60

percent

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per cent

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of inmates who have a good profession and diploma never commit a crime again.

On the other hand

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, there is an argument that criminals can

be rehabilitate

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be rehabilitated

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through other methods than sending them to

prison

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In other words

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instead

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of sentencing

criminal

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criminals

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to time in

prison

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, we should attract them

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show examples

other useful works.

As a result

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, they work beneficially for society and feel important and useful to the general public.

Correct word choice

This

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this

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kind of

feelings

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feeling

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to urge

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urges

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people never

re-offend

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to re-offend

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when they are released. In conclusion,

although

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it is

common

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a common

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belief that

prison

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is the best way to punish criminals, I believe it is not necessary in

majority

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the majority

a majority

show examples

of cases. Personally, I think

prison

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should be the

last

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option when all else has failed.

uluga2002Sat Apr 05 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Make sure to use clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to guide the reader through your argumentation. This will enhance the overall structure of your essay.

task achievement

Try to develop your ideas further, providing more comprehensive examples or explanations to fully illustrate your points.

coherence and cohesion

Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and phrasing. For example, 'any criminal have' should be 'any criminal has' and 'in there' should be 'there'.

task achievement

You presented both sides of the argument well and expressed a clear opinion at the end of the essay, which is important for task achievement.

task achievement

Your use of examples, like the relative who served time, adds a personal touch and engages the reader, showing your effort to connect the ideas with real-life scenarios.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

306 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

lawbreakers
prison
alternatives
deterrence
rehabilitation
recidivism
overcrowding
financial strains
community service
vocational training
restorative justice
make amends
diversion programs
non-violent offenders
mental health problems

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In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation

You recently moved to a new city and are looking for a gym to join. Write a letter to the manager of a gym in your neighborhood. In your letter: Introduce yourself. Say why you are interested in the gym. Ask about the facilities available and membership options.