Many people aim to improve their living standard by economic development, but some important social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages?
There is no denying the fact that Many folks aim to improve their way of living standard by economic development, but some important social values and characteristics are lost
as a result
. while
it is a commonly held belief that Many people aim to improve their living standard , there is also
an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider asking a group of people who have tried this
experience because they have the knowledge.
To begin
with, Social values and standard economic development I would say that it has both beneficial and negative effects.In other words
, traveling
to other countries for a standard salary is not worth it . Change the spelling
travelling
In addition
, You could make money online and you could work through your computer without thinking of travelling. For example
, in "Hassan and the Interview" Hassan had an interview and he nailed the job
the most fun and exciting part of this
job
is that he will work online while
he is sitting at home.
Another point to consider, it is not easy to get a job
with excellent payouts. It is also
possible to say that if you have experience you may find a job
in a short time period. Moreover
, Some occupations can not be done remotely, For instance
, Hassan was searching on the websites for a software engineer job
and luckily one day, he got what he was looking for.
In conclusion, despite people having different views, I believe that with patience and persistence, you can find everything.Submitted by fnokgamer11 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this siteβs author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic and presents an opinion, but it lacks depth in explanation and argumentation. Consider elaborating more on how economic development affects social values and living standards.
coherence cohesion
Work on structuring your essay better. The ideas within each paragraph need to connect more clearly. Use more transition words to enhance the flow.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present, but the introduction could be more engaging, and the conclusion a bit more conclusive. Summarize your main points more effectively.
task achievement
Include more relevant and specific examples to support your points more convincingly. Personal anecdotes are good, but integrating broader examples would add value.
task achievement
You have a clear stance on the topic and attempt to provide examples for support.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has an introduction and a conclusion, which provides a sense of completeness.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!