t’s important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children? Korkem

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Many people think that

children

Use synonyms

must understand what is right and what is wrong from a young age. Some

also

Linking Words

believe that

punishment

Use synonyms

is a good way to teach

this

Linking Words

. I agree with

this

Linking Words

idea, but I think the

punishment

Use synonyms

should be light and safe. I agree because

children

Use synonyms

live in a society where there are rules. If they break

rules

Correct article usage

the rules

show examples

, there are consequences.

This

Linking Words

is the same in school and in the adult world, like in the criminal system.

For example

Linking Words

, in school, if a child is always shouting, the teacher can take away play time. In real life, if someone breaks the law, they may go to jail. So, it is good to teach

children

Use synonyms

early with simple rules and fair punishments. Parents and teachers should not use physical

punishment

Use synonyms

. Hitting

children

Use synonyms

is not a good way.

Instead

Linking Words

, they can use other ways.

For example

Linking Words

, give them time-out, take away a toy, or not allow

Correct pronoun usage

them to

show examples

watch cartoons.

This

Linking Words

helps the child to understand that bad

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

has a result, but they are not hurt. In conclusion, I believe

punishment

Use synonyms

can help

children

Use synonyms

learn what is wrong, but it must be soft and safe. Teachers and parents should use simple and kind ways to teach good

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

b_aliya_k89Mon Apr 07 2025

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task achievement

While your introduction presents a clear opinion, consider elaborating a bit more on the reasons behind your stance. This could strengthen your argument.

coherence and cohesion

Try to use more transitions between your ideas to enhance the flow of your essay. For example, using phrases like 'Furthermore' or 'Additionally' can help connect your points more clearly.

task achievement

Provide a wider range of examples to support your points, such as mentioning specific developmental benefits of understanding consequences.

task achievement

Your essay clearly outlines your stance on the issue and you provide some relevant examples to support your points, which is commendable.

coherence and cohesion

The structure of your essay is logical, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion, making it easy to follow.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

209 words

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

In many towns and cities,large shopping malls are replacing small local shops.Dou you think this is a positive development?Give your reasons and examples.

Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Enhance future lifestyle is this a negative or positive development?

some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Computer games and films containing violence are popular today. Some people think that these are harmful for our society and the government should ban them. Other argue that such games and films are fine for entertainment. Discuss both views and give your opinion.