These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this outwiegh the disadvantages

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In recent years, the number of people using mobile

phones

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and the

internet

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has increased significantly. Some argue that

this

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trend brings numerous drawbacks,

such

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as addiction and serious health issues like poor vision and obesity.

However

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, I firmly believe that its advantages, including interaction receiving information and promoting products , outweigh its disadvantages.

This

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essay will examine both the benefits and drawbacks of mobile

phones

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and the

Internet

Use synonyms

. One of the most significant advantages of using mobile

phones

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and the

Internet

Use synonyms

is communication. People can use social networks

such

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as Instagram and Facebook, in order to interact with their close ones without losing time for meeting in real life. Thereby the

Internet

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and mobile phone usage plays a significant role in strengthening personal relationships. Another key benefit of the

Internet

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is receiving essential information. Statistics in Kazakhstan show that students who use YouTube, have higher achievements, compared to those who rely on only coursebooks.

This

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demonstrates that using mobile

phones

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and the

Internet

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is necessary for modern education.

Finally

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, the

Internet

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allows companies to promote their products. a notable example of

this

Linking Words

is Google Ads which targets customers who are willing to purchase the goods, allowing consumers to be aware of products. Despite these advantages, using mobile

phones

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and the

Internet

Use synonyms

has drawbacks. One major concern is the risk of addiction.

This

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issue arises primarily

due to

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intensive usage of the

Internet

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, leading to waste of time,

as well as

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social isolation.

Furthermore

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, the overuse of mobile

phones

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and the

Internet

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results in severe health issues. The majority of individuals spend a large proportion of their leisure time looking at screens, causing strain on the eyes which causes poor vision.

Moreover

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, using mobile

phones

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and the

Internet

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fosters sedentary lifestyles which leads to obesity.

pandatvin3Wed Apr 09 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Consider strengthening your conclusion by summarizing the main points more clearly and re-emphasizing your stance.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has clear topic sentences to enhance both structure and clarity, guiding the reader through your argument.

task achievement

Incorporate more specific examples or data to support your points, as this will strengthen your argument and provide clarity.

task achievement

The essay presents a clear opinion that is consistent throughout, demonstrating good task achievement.

task achievement

Strong points about the advantages of mobile phones and the internet, with relevant examples that effectively illustrate your ideas.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

295 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

connectivity
geographical barriers
social media
communities
perspectives
isolation
anxiety
depression
cyberbullying
superficial relationships
dependence
interactions
facilitate
emotional consequences
face-to-face interactions

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These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this outwiegh the disadvantages

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people think that to learn about other countries, they need to travel. Some say that it is not necessary to travel; we can have information through TV and the Internet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Student should pay the full cost for their study because university education benefit individuals rather than society. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

Some people say it is important to keep your home and work place tidy with everything organized and in the correct places. What is your opinion about it?