IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Both government investment in public transport systems and reductions in public transport ticket prices will help to reduce transport pollution greatly. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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One of the effective ways to address
transport
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 pollution problems is a government's investment in public
transportation
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 systems and reductions in ticket
prices
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 of public
transport
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. I
strong
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strongly
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 agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement because both approaches can increase convenience and lower individuals' expenses, encouraging
people
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 to commute by public
transportation
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instead
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 of private cars. In terms of the
tranportation
Correct your spelling
transportation
 investment,
this
Linking Words
 approach can increase routes of public
transport
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 to cover all destinations, influencing
people
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 to use public
transportation
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 more. Not only coverage areas but
also
Linking Words
 the time required for
transport
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 is equally important. If the systems can serve both purposes, passengers are more willing to travel by public
transport
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.
For instance
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, trains in Japan offer various paths that cover many areas of cities.
As a result
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, Japanese
people
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 choose to travel by train as a top priority, reducing the number of cars on roads and eventually decreasing pollution. For lower
prices
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 of
tranportation
Correct your spelling
transportation
,
this
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 results in cutting citizens' expenditures and makes
transportation
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 more affordable.
People
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 tend to use the cheapest mode of
transportation
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 because they have to save their money for their desired things or spend on other necessities. With reasonable
prices
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, public
transport
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 will be
better
Correct article usage
a better
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options
Fix the agreement mistake
option
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 for travel.
For example
Linking Words
, bus tickets in China are affordable,
many
Correct word choice
and many
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people
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 including native citizens and tourists prioritize
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
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 by
buses
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bus
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 over other modes of
transportation
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.
This
Linking Words
finally
Linking Words
 decreases the demand
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 private car services, tackling pollution effectively. In conclusion, I firmly agree that an investment from
a
Correct article usage
the
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 government in public
transportation
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 and the reasonable
prices
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 of
transportation
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 tickets are key solutions to mitigate environmental issues. If public
transportation
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 is more convenient and cheaper, individuals will definitely commute by it rather than spending on private cars.

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language
Ensure correct spelling of 'transportation' and 'transport'.
coherence
In the introduction, consider rephrasing 'One of the effective ways' to 'One effective way' for clarity.
task achievement
Strengthen the link between reducing ticket prices and pollution reduction with a clearer explanation.
coherence
Good overall argument structure with clear supporting examples.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainable transport
  • carbon footprint
  • mass transit
  • subsidization
  • fare reduction
  • environmental impact
  • urban planning
  • public policy
  • commuter behavior
  • infrastructural development
  • economic efficiency
  • equitable access
  • lifestyle shift
  • congestion
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