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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that children should begin formal education at a very early age. Others believe they should start school at the age of seven. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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According to
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 some people, it is better to start formal education at a very young age. Others believe that they should start
school
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 when they are seven
years
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 old.
While
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 starting
school
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 at
early
Add an article
an early
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 age can help children achieve more in the future, I feel they should feel the freedom of childhood before the academic environment. Starting
school
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 early is a significant milestone to achieving more success in
life
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. Those children will have finished
school
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while
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 their peers will still be studying. It can open up new opportunities for them. They might already be employed, running businesses and be experienced in their early twenties.
Moreover
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, they can be financially independent from their parents and have their own professional
life
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. They can mentor their peers, which can enhance their social reputation.
In contrast
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, people who started academic
life
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 later may have their career but they may have less experience. So, they may seek help from those who have already achieved their goals and success.
However
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, I firmly believe that they should enjoy a sense of freedom and emotional growth in their childhood. These
years
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 are irreplaceable and a unique opportunity for building strong bonds with family. They will never be able to spend time with their parents again. So, it is the time for something to enjoy, develop emotionally, strengthen bonds with their family and learn about
life
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 with loved ones.
Furthermore
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, if they start
school
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 at an early age, they struggle to understand some subjects or complex topics.
Also
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, they may not be aware of any social norms and rules at
school
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 when talking with teachers and students.
In addition
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 to
this
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, they do not know how to act as a student yet, so it is better to start academic
life
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 when they are ready, at least at seven
years
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 old. In conclusion,
while
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 starting
school
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 early has its benefits like achieving more and being more successful than their peers, I think it is better to start when they are emotionally and mentally mature. Childhood
years
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 should be a time for emotional development and strengthening bonds with family, which is crucial for future well-being.

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to support your points. This could enhance the clarity and relevance of your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your transition phrases are varied to help guide the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion on the topic, which is effectively addressed throughout.
coherence and cohesion
The structure of the essay is logical and easy to follow, which aids comprehension.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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