Sports play a significant role in promoting physical and mental well-being. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is no denying the fact that practice plays a crucial role in our daily lives.
While
Linking Words
it is a commonly held belief that training is important for promoting our physical and mental health, there is
also
Linking Words
an opposing argument. In my opinion, I believe that sport is beneficial to our health.
To begin
Linking Words
with, some people believe that sport can help our bodies stay fit and slim.
In other words
Linking Words
, many individuals suffer from a sedentary lifestyle; they spend a lot of time in front of digital devices
such
Linking Words
as phones and computers, and they often use cars even for short distances.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they play sports to maintain their health.
In addition
Linking Words
, training can help reduce diseases related to being overweight,
such
Linking Words
as heart and lung illnesses.
For example
Linking Words
, a study conducted in Japan shows that sport helps overweight people become fit and healthy. Another important point to consider is that fitness is crucial for our mental well-being. It is
also
Linking Words
possible to say that it enhances the production of "feel-good" hormones, which help reduce stress, anxiety, and depression throughout the day.
Moreover
Linking Words
, some research shows that training can improve our ability to learn.
For instance
Linking Words
, a survey shows that approximately 60% of respondents claim that when they want to learn new things, they listen to audiobooks or watch presentations
while
Linking Words
at the gym. In conclusion, despite the people may have different opinions, I believe that regular training is essential because it positively affects our physical and mental well-being.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
While the introduction presents the author's opinion, it could be more clearly structured by stating the main points to be discussed in the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences could be better connected with linking words or phrases to improve the flow of ideas, especially between the second and third sentences of the first body paragraph.
task achievement
In the second body paragraph, rather than saying 'some research shows', it would be stronger to provide a specific example or citation for better credibility.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion on the topic and provides relevant points to support that opinion.
coherence and cohesion
There is a good introduction and conclusion that frames the argument well, helping the reader understand the writer's stance.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • physical well-being
  • mental well-being
  • regular exercise
  • chronic diseases
  • weight management
  • endorphins
  • depression
  • anxiety
  • stress
  • team sports
  • social skills
  • friendships
  • teamwork
  • life skills
  • discipline
  • time management
  • perseverance
  • cognitive function
  • concentration
  • academic performance
What to do next:
Look at other essays: