Celebrities make a very good living out of media attention and have chosen to live in the public spotlight. They have no right to complain when they feel the media are intruding on their privacy. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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There is no denying the fact that
celebrities
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are always in the public eye
due to
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media
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attention.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that they should not complain about
media
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invading their privacy, there is
also
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an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that
celebrities
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, like any other person, have the right to some level of privacy, especially when it comes to their personal lives.
To begin
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with, many people believe that fame comes with a price.
In other words
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,
celebrities
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choose a lifestyle that includes public attention and
media
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coverage.
In addition
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, they earn a lot of money and grow their careers through the same
media
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that follows them.
For example
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, famous actors and singers often become more successful because of interviews, social
media
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, and news stories that increase their popularity and keep them in the spotlight. Another point to be considered is that
celebrities
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are
also
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human beings with feelings and personal struggles. It is
also
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possible to say that they deserve respect and personal space, especially when they are with their families or facing private challenges.
Moreover
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, constant attention from the
media
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can cause stress, anxiety, and even serious mental health problems.
For instance
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, many
celebrities
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have spoken publicly about the pressure of always being watched and judged by the public and the emotional impact it has on them.
To sum up
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, despite people having different points of view, I believe that
celebrities
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should be given a fair amount of privacy.
Media
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can cover their public life, but their personal life should always be respected and protected.

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples or case studies of celebrities who have spoken about their privacy issues. This will strengthen your argument and provide a clearer connection between your points and real-life situations.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use more linking words and phrases to enhance the flow of your arguments. For example, words like 'furthermore,' 'in contrast,' or 'on the contrary' can help in connecting ideas more fluidly.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction is clear, but you could enhance it by briefly stating the opposing viewpoint before presenting your own opinion. This shows a more nuanced understanding of the topic.
task achievement
You've done well to outline both sides of the argument about privacy and media attention, which demonstrates a balanced view of the issue.
coherence and cohesion
Your writing is clear and articulate, making it easy for the reader to understand your point of view.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Public spotlight
  • Media intrusion
  • Social contract
  • Paparazzi
  • Ethical limits
  • Mental health
  • Privacy rights
  • Public persona
  • Harassment
  • Media scrutiny
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