A healthy person is often described as someone who has a good diet, gets plenty of exercise and avoid stresses. What should people do to stay healthy in your country? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience?
There is no doubt that the most healthy person that someone has a good
healthy
. In my opinion, I strongly believe that Replace the word
health
the
exercise Correct article usage
apply
improve
our Change the verb form
improves
health
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and
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apply
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decrease
decreases
decress
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decreases
the
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stress
stressess
and Correct your spelling
stresses
stress
avoid
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avoids
the
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apply
sicks
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sick
On the other hand
, others believe that the . They Linking Words
are think
that Genes play Change the verb form
think
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excersice
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exercise
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health
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healthy
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is
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excersie
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exercise
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, it can be said that genes play Linking Words
the
basic in Correct article usage
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the
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To conclude
, Linking Words
although
there are convincing arguments on both sides, I believe that both Linking Words
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affect
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apply
health
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diffrent
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differently
that
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to
abour
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about
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task achievement
The introduction could be clearer by directly stating what people should do to stay healthy in your country.
coherence and cohesion
Try to structure your paragraphs better. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea and support it with examples.
task achievement
Use more precise language. Words like 'improve' and 'decrease' are good, but make sure to use the correct forms (e.g., 'exercise improves our health').
task achievement
To strengthen your arguments, you could include additional examples or statistics about health and exercise in your country.
task achievement
You started with a clear opinion, which is important for engaging the reader.
coherence and cohesion
You attempted to address different perspectives regarding health, showing critical thinking.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite