IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The pie charts below give information about the population of South Korea in 2000 and 2050. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie charts below give information about the population of South Korea in 2000 and 2050. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given pie charts compare the
detail
Fix the agreement mistake
details
show examples
 of
Correct article usage
the populance
show examples
populance
Correct your spelling
populace
 of South Korea
among
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
years
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2000 and 2050. First of all, Yemen had
highest
Change the article
the highest
show examples
percentage
Use synonyms
 (50.1%) of
youngsters
Replace the word
young
show examples
 residents in 2000,
whereas
Linking Words
 it would decrease by 13.1% in 2050 and remain
37.0
Change preposition
at 37.0
show examples
%.
However
Linking Words
,
15
Correct article usage
the 15
show examples
-59
years
Use synonyms
 people proportion was 46.3% which would be more than half
Use synonyms
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
show examples
 of citizens in future. The number of over 60
years
Use synonyms
 old individuals
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 at
very
Correct article usage
the very
show examples
 lowest number
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 3.7%
that
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 could
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
grow by 2% in 2050. Looking at the Italy community, in 2000, Italy had more than half
Use synonyms
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
show examples
 of 15-
59
Replace the word
59-year-old
show examples
years
Use synonyms
 people which would be only 46.2% in 2050.
However
Linking Words
, only 24.1%
Change preposition
of edlest
show examples
edlest
Correct your spelling
eldest
 (60+
years
Use synonyms
) lived in Italy in 2000 and the
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of elders would
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
almost double in the upcoming
years
Use synonyms
. The
percentage
Use synonyms
 of juveniles (0-14
years
Use synonyms
) was at
lowest
Add an article
the lowest
show examples
 number and would
be declined
Wrong verb form
decline
show examples
 in 2050
also
Linking Words
.
Overall
Linking Words
,
mostly
Correct your spelling
most
show examples
 children lived in Yemen in past
years
Use synonyms
 which would change by 15 -59
years
Use synonyms
 in 2050. But, Italy had
totally
Correct article usage
a totally
show examples
 different age population in past
years
Use synonyms
 which were
adutls
Correct your spelling
adults
 and would
be remain
Change the verb form
remain
show examples
 high in 2050.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words years, percentage with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remain" was used 2 times.
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