IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

some countries have introduced laws to limit working hours for employees. Why are these laws introduced? Do you think they are a positive or negative development?

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In recent years, various countries have implemented laws to limit the number of
hours
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employees
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 can
work
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 each week. These measures have been introduced primarily to protect workers from physical and mental exhaustion which can result from prolonged periods of
work
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 without adequate rest.
Therefore
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, governments have intervened to ensure a healthier
work
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-life balance.
To begin
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 with, one major reason behind
such
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 legislation is the growing concern over public health. Studies have shown that excessive working
hours
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 can lead to chronic stress, cardiovascular problems and even depression.
Moreover
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, overworked
employees
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 are more likely to make mistakes which can reduce
overall
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 productivity and increase the risk of accidents, especially in high-stakes professions like healthcare or transportation.
As a result
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, limiting
work
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hours
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 is not only just benefits to individual
employees
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,
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apply
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 but
also
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 crucial for maintaining workplace safety and efficiency. In my opinion,
this
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 development is overwhelmingly positive.
Firstly
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, it helps create a more sustainable
work
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 environment where
employees
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 can remain productive over the long term.
Secondly
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, it allows individuals to spend more quality time with their families, pursue hobbies or engage in physical activities which contribute to a healthier lifestyle.
Furthermore
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, companies that respect working hour regulations tend to attract more loyal and motivated staff, which can enhance their reputation and long-term success. In conclusion, the introduction of laws to limit working
hours
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 is a commendable step towards promoting better health, safety and
overall
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 quality of life.
While
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 some businesses may
initially
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 resist these changes
due to
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 concerns about reduced output, the long-term benefits for both
employees
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 and employers clearly outweigh the drawbacks.

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task achievement
Ensure that your introduction clearly states both sides of the argument you plan to discuss. This will help set the stage for your analysis and provide a more comprehensive answer to the prompt.
coherence
Vary your sentence structures to enhance the engagement of your writing. This can include using different types of clauses and phrases instead of sticking to simpler sentence forms.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced perspective, addressing both the reasons for the laws and their benefits, which is commendable.
coherence
Your ideas are logically organized, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument and see the progression of your thoughts.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • 1. Burnout
  • 2. Work-life balance
  • 3. Productivity
  • 4. Diminishing returns
  • 5. Ethical responsibility
  • 6. Exploitation
  • 7. Fair labor practices
  • 8. Chronic illnesses
  • 9. Job creation
  • 10. Unemployment rates
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