IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Below is a map of the city of Brandfield. City planners have decided to build a new shopping mall for the area, and two sites, S1 and S2 have been proposed. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The map illustrates the two possible sites for a new shopping complex in the
city
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 of Brandfield. The initial difference between
two
Correct article usage
the two
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 sites is that the first
site
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 is near a residential
area
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,
while
Linking Words
 the other is close to an industrial region. The first
site
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 (S1) is located to the north of the
city
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 between the residential
area
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 and the
city
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 centre. There are three infrastructure features (a river, a main road and a railway) around S1,
thus
Linking Words
, these transports may provide easy access from most
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
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 of the
city
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, if a shopping mall is built in that
area
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. The second
site
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 (S2) lies to the
south-east
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southeast
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 end of the
city
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 and is fairly close to the downtown and the industrial part. The
site
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 is near two main roads and the railroad;
however
Linking Words
, has no residential part around the
area
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. There is a large Golf Course and a park
in
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on
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 the west side of the
city
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, but both sites are not close to the given
area
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.

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task achievement
The introduction could be more structured, providing a clearer overview of what the essay will cover. Consider explicitly stating what the features of the sites are and what comparisons will be made.
coherence and cohesion
While the essay does present some comparisons, there could be a more thorough examination of each site's advantages and disadvantages in terms of accessibility and proximity to residential areas.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to include a brief conclusion summarizing the key points discussed in the essay to wrap up your response.
task achievement
The essay effectively identifies the key differences between Site S1 and Site S2, which is essential for responding to the task.
task achievement
There is a good attempt to incorporate specific details about the infrastructure around each site, showing an understanding of the key features of the map.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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