IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people choose to spend their leisure time with colleagues from their workplace. Others prefer to keep their personal life and working life separate. Is it a good idea to spend leisure time with people from work? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write 250 words.

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Spending leisure time with colleagues from the workplace is a topic that often divides opinions. In my view,
while
Linking Words
 it can be beneficial in some situations, it is important to maintain a balance between professional and personal life. On one hand, spending time with colleagues outside of
work
Use synonyms
 can strengthen relationships and build a more positive
work
Use synonyms
 environment. When people interact casually, they often develop better understanding and trust, which can lead to improved teamwork and collaboration at the office.
For example
Linking Words
, team outings or casual gatherings can break down formal barriers, making it easier to communicate openly during
work
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it can be especially helpful for new employees to bond with their coworkers and feel more comfortable in a new environment.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, constantly mixing personal and professional lives may lead to complications. If conflicts arise in personal settings, they might carry over into the workplace and affect professionalism.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, some people prefer to keep a clear boundary between
work
Use synonyms
 and their private life in order to relax fully and avoid
work
Use synonyms
-related stress outside office hours.
For instance
Linking Words
, a friend of mine who worked in a high-pressure sales job found that spending weekends with coworkers often turned into
work
Use synonyms
 discussions, leaving him feeling like he was never truly off duty. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 socializing with colleagues can strengthen bonds and improve teamwork, it is equally important to maintain personal boundaries. A healthy balance allows individuals to enjoy the benefits of both professional relationships and personal space.

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task achievement
The essay presents a balanced view on the topic, addressing both perspectives effectively. However, stronger examples or more specific details could enhance the argument.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is mostly well-organized. However, the transitions between some sentences could be smoother to improve the overall flow.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction provides a clear thesis statement and effectively sets the stage for the discussion.
coherence and cohesion
The conclusion summarises the main points succinctly, reaffirming the need for balance between personal and professional relationships.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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