In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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In today's competitive market, many companies promote their
products
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claiming they are innovative.
Although
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I partly agree with
such
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a mindset because I believe that
this
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is how companies keep consumers updated about developments,
however
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, I argue that
this
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could carry some drawbacks. 
Firstly
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, there are various reasons why businesses advocate for the novelty of their
products
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.
This
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allows them to be different from other competitors and easily stand out.
For example
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, in industries like technology, where
products
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are rather similar to one another, presenting something as new can capture consumer's attention.
For instance
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, Apple hosts an event annually for launching a new gadget, which hundreds of people attend.
This
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results in thousands of eager buyers who want to purchase the latest product even if they do not necessarily need to. 
Consequently
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, the unnecessary push of purchasing new devices constantly results in various issues. One of which, many people tend to replace their older devices even if they are perfectly functional, leading to financial waste.
This
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is thought to usually be
due to
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peer pressure. Individuals are always keen to follow one another and they get easily influenced by their surroundings.
Moreover
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,
this
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overconsumption leads to environmental issues, as the older
products
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usually end up in landfills and are difficult to recycle.  In a nutshell, advertising can be very beneficial for companies as it allows them to be competitive and drive technological advances, yet if
such
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promotions were not regulated
this
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can lead to financial losses
as well as
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environmental damage.

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task achievement
Consider providing more comprehensive ideas that further develop your main arguments. This would strengthen your position and demonstrate deeper critical thinking.
coherence
Make sure to connect your ideas more explicitly. Using transition phrases can improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs, making your argumentation clearer.
task achievement
Include additional examples or case studies to substantiate your claims. This would enhance the persuasiveness of your argument and show a wider awareness of the topic.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear line of reasoning and addresses the question by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of advertising.
task achievement
Your examples, especially regarding Apple's marketing events, are effective and illustrate your points well.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Innovation
  • Fast-paced
  • Distinguishing
  • Psychological aspect
  • Inherently
  • Perceived
  • Continuous improvement
  • Revolutionary
  • Feasible
  • Throwaway culture
  • Undervalue
  • Longevity
  • Obscure
  • Novelty
  • Unsatisfactory
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