With the increased global demand for oil and gas, undiscovered areas of the world should be opened up to access more resources. To what extent do you agree?

The increasing urbanization and expanding global population undeniably lead to a surge in

energy

Use synonyms

consumption, a significant portion of which is currently met by fossil

fuels

Use synonyms

While

Linking Words

some advocate for exploring and exploiting new petroleum reserves to address

this

Linking Words

growing demand, I firmly believe that

such

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a perspective poses substantial and far-reaching environmental challenges. Prioritizing the continued extraction of fossil

fuels

Use synonyms

risks exacerbating climate change, damaging fragile ecosystems, and ultimately undermining long-term sustainability.

While

Linking Words

the necessity of

energy

Use synonyms

resources for our continued existence is undeniable, it is crucial to acknowledge the significant detrimental impacts of fossil

fuels

Use synonyms

. These resources not only exert negative pressures on the natural world, contributing to global warming and escalating pollution levels

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but are

also

Linking Words

finite and non-renewable.

This

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inherent limitation renders them unsustainable for long-term utilization.

For instance

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, recent research from Harvard University indicates that the use of these

energy

Use synonyms

sources damages the ozone layer.

This

Linking Words

damage, in turn, contributes to the accelerated melting of glaciers in the North Pole

due to

Linking Words

rising temperatures and, alarmingly, leads to an increased incidence of skin cancers

as a result

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of heightened exposure to hazardous radiation. In my opinion, completely eliminating the use of fossil

fuels

Use synonyms

in the immediate future presents a significant challenge.

Therefore

Linking Words

, a more pragmatic approach lies in progressively reducing our reliance on them by actively transitioning to alternative forms of

energy

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

shift offers numerous benefits, notably in mitigating pollution, a major drawback of fossil

fuels

Use synonyms

that contributes to a range of health problems.

Furthermore

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, these alternative

energy

Use synonyms

sources are often renewable, ensuring their availability for generations to come. Economically,

this

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strategy can

also

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bolster national economies by decreasing the need for petroleum imports. Recent research

further

Linking Words

underscores the urgency of

this

Linking Words

transition, indicating that we will likely face a scarcity of fossil

fuels

Use synonyms

in the not-too-distant future, thereby highlighting the critical importance of developing and embracing non-conventional

energy

Use synonyms

alternatives. In conclusion, a greater emphasis on renewable

energy

Use synonyms

sources

such

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as solar power is a prudent and necessary direction. Solar

energy

Use synonyms

offers a multitude of significant advantages that can effectively mitigate the environmental and economic challenges associated with fossil

fuels

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, issues that we will undoubtedly confront with increasing urgency in the future.

m.hadavi20Wed Apr 30 2025

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Task Achievement

The essay effectively addresses the topic and presents a clear position on the issue. However, ensuring that each point made consistently supports the main argument could enhance the depth of discussion.

Coherence and Cohesion

The logical flow of the essay is quite strong, but some paragraphs could benefit from smoother transitions to connect the ideas. Consider using more linking phrases to guide the reader through your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion

The introduction clearly states your position, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main arguments, reinforcing your viewpoint.

Task Achievement

You provide relevant examples that support your arguments, such as the impacts of fossil fuels on the ozone layer and health issues, which demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

368 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

global demand
finite resources
energy consumption
exploiting
untouched ecosystems
carbon emissions
climate change
renewable energy
sustainable energy solutions
geopolitical consequences
territorial disputes
dependency

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