At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries today, the proportion of young adults is significantly higher than that of older people.

While

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this

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demographic trend may present certain challenges, I believe it

also

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offers substantial advantages. In

this

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essay, I will discuss both the benefits and drawbacks of having a youthful

population

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. One major benefit is the increase in the working-age

population

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. Young adults are often more proficient in modern technology and bring fresh perspectives that can improve both businesses and public services, thereby supporting long-term economic development.

In addition

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, many young people are more adaptable, eager to learn, and open to innovation. These qualities drive progress in fields

such

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as science, education, and the creative industries.

As a result

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, countries with a large number of young people may be better equipped to compete in the global economy and respond quickly to new challenges.

However

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, there are

also

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some disadvantages. A surge in the youth

population

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can lead to increased pressure on the job market. When too many young adults enter the workforce at once, it may result in high levels of unemployment, which can lead to frustration and social unrest.

Additionally

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, there is the risk of losing cultural values and traditions. As younger generations tend to adopt modern lifestyles and global trends, important customs may not be passed down. Over time,

this

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could result in a country gradually losing part of its cultural identity. In conclusion,

while

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a youthful

population

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can promote innovation and economic progress, it may

also

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bring challenges related to employment and cultural continuity. In my opinion, a balanced

population

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is the best way to build a strong and culturally rich nation.

bellchatpaveeSun May 04 2025

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task achievement

You're clearly addressing both the advantages and disadvantages of the youthful population, which is essential for task achievement. To strengthen your argument, you might consider providing more specific examples or case studies to support your points.

coherence

While your essay is well-structured, some transitions could be smoother. For example, using transition phrases explicitly when introducing the disadvantages could help improve coherence. Ensure that ideas flow logically from one paragraph to the next.

coherence

Your introduction presents a clear overview of the topic and outlines your position effectively, which draws the reader in right from the start.

task achievement

You clearly articulate the benefits of a youthful population, particularly in the context of economic development and innovation, which reflects strong comprehension of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

People doing dangerous sporting activities like scuba-diving and bungee-jumping should be responsible for their own safety. Rescue workers should not risk their lives to save people doing those sports. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that keeping pets is good for children while others think it is dangerous and unhealthy. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The increase in mobile phone use in recent years has led to many social problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?