Some people believe that students should be required to study art and music in school. Others think it is a waste of time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

This

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topic is becoming increasingly important as schools try to balance between academic subjects and creative development. In

this

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essay, I am going to discuss the reasons for the two views and give my opinion that will be based on a logical reason. Some people argue against the idea of making

art

Use synonyms

and

music

Use synonyms

mandatory for several reasons. The main reason given to support

this

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claim is that they believe that some

students

Use synonyms

do not have an interest in arts. To illustrate, some

students

Use synonyms

may struggle with

art

Use synonyms

music

Use synonyms

and feel stressed if they are forced to study it.

In other words

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students

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get more time to strengthen other skills in math, science and languages which might enhance their academic or professional opportunities.

According to

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people who support arts and

music

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, the advantages involve many aspects.

Firstly

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, making

students

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able to expand their thinking.

Consequently

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, their level of understanding would rise in the key subjects.

Secondly

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, they can figure out their talents earlier.

This

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is because the classes develop various abilities.

For instance

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, in countries like Finland where

art

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is an essential part of education,

students

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often show higher

overall

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satisfaction and creativity. In conclusion,

although

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some people believe

art

Use synonyms

and

music

Use synonyms

are not necessary, others strongly support including them in the curriculum.

Therefore

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, I believe that teaching

art

Use synonyms

and

music

Use synonyms

should be as important as other subjects. So, schools must ensure steps are taken to prevent

this

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phenomenon from deteriorating future. I personally believe that every student should have a chance to explore their creative side, as

this

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contributes to a more well-rounded and fulfilling education.

Abeer Mon May 05 2025

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task achievement

Your introduction provides a clear overview of the topic, but try to make your thesis statement more explicit. Additionally, ensure that your logical reasons supporting your opinion are clearly articulated.

coherence and cohesion

While your essay flows reasonably well, more seamless transitions between points could enhance the coherence. For instance, instead of simply saying 'according to people who support arts and music,' consider introducing the point more fluidly to improve the connection to the previous argument.

task achievement

Your examples, particularly the reference to Finland, effectively illustrate your points and strengthen your argument.

coherence and cohesion

The structure of your essay is clear, with distinct paragraphs for each viewpoint and a conclusion that summarizes your stance well.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

268 words

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Some people believe that students should be required to study art and music in school. Others think it is a waste of time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

People now have the freedom to work and live anywhere in the world due to the development of communication technology and transportation. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?