IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people believe that the government should invest more money in public transport instead of building new roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Modern cities face chronic traffic congestion and air pollution. I strongly agree that governments ought to prioritize funding public
transport
Use synonyms
 systems over constructing additional road infrastructure. Investing in buses, trams, and metro networks yields greater environmental and social dividends in the long run.
Firstly
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, enhanced public
transport
Use synonyms
 reduces reliance on private cars, thereby mitigating congestion and lowering carbon emissions.
For instance
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, in Bogotá, Colombia, the expansion of the TransMilenio bus rapid transit system led to a 30% drop in rush-hour traffic within two years.
This
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 not only improved commute times but
also
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 contributed to cleaner air, demonstrating the long-term sustainability of mass-transit investment.
Secondly
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, affordable and efficient public
transport
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 promotes social equity by ensuring that lower-income citizens can access employment, education, and healthcare.
In contrast
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, building more roads primarily benefits car owners and often exacerbates urban sprawl.
Moreover
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, the maintenance costs of extensive highway networks can strain public budgets,
whereas
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mass-transit
Correct your spelling
mass transit
show examples
 systems can be subsidized through fare revenues and dedicated taxes. In conclusion,
while
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 road expansion may offer temporary relief from traffic jams, it is ultimately a short-sighted solution. Governments should
instead
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 allocate resources to public
transport
Use synonyms
, which delivers enduring environmental, economic, and social benefits.

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Task Achievement
Consider including a counterargument to strengthen your position. Acknowledging the benefits of road construction and refuting them can enhance your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
While your logical structure is strong, ensure that each paragraph seamlessly connects to the next to enhance overall flow. A few linking phrases can improve transitions.
Task Achievement
Your use of specific examples, such as the Bogotá transit system, effectively supports your claims and demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your argument is well-structured, with clear main points and a logical progression, making it easy for the reader to follow your reasoning.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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