IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

You would like to join the local Orchestra write a letter of application to the orchestra. in this letter introduce yourself and your instrument of choice explain how your credential makes you a good candidate express your enthusiasm for music

Dear Madam, My name is Ruxsora and I am writing to apply for a position in your local orchestra. I am a passionate musician, and I have been playing the violin for more than eight years.
Music
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 is not just a hobby for me it is an important part of my life and identity. I started learning the violin at the age of ten, and since
then
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, I have participated in many concerts, school performances, and regional
music
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 competitions. I have completed formal training at
talanted
Correct your spelling
talented
 people school, where I developed strong technical skills and a deep appreciation for classical and modern
music
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.
In addition
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 to my practical experience, I
also
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 have a solid understanding of
music
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 theory. I often practice with small ensembles and enjoy playing in harmony with others. I believe that my dedication, teamwork skills, and ability to adapt to different musical styles make me a strong candidate for your orchestra. Joining your orchestra would be a dream come true. I am eager to learn from other talented musicians and contribute to the success of the group. I am confident that I can bring both skill and enthusiasm to every rehearsal and performance. Thank you for considering my application. I would be very grateful for the opportunity to audition and demonstrate my abilities in person. Yours faithfully, Ruxsora🤭

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use commas to separate clauses properly. For example, in your opening sentence, consider adding a comma after 'hobby for me'.
task achievement
Try to expand on your enthusiasm for music even further—perhaps by mentioning a specific piece you love or a particular performance experience that moved you.
task achievement
Your introduction is strong and clearly states your purpose for writing the letter.
coherence and cohesion
You have successfully conveyed your passion for music and your experience in a structured manner.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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