IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people say that art can be made by everyone, while others believe that it can only be made by those with special abilities and talents. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

People have
differents
Correct your spelling
different
show examples
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
show examples
 about
art
Use synonyms
: certain
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 argue that everyone
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 the
abilities
Fix the agreement mistake
ability
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 to do
art
Use synonyms
 in their own way,
while
Linking Words
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 believe that
art
Use synonyms
 is only for people who are born with talent for it. As regards the first group of supporters,
art
Use synonyms
 isn't just paint a picture but it can be manifested in different ways, one of these is dance. To
became
Change the form of the verb
become
show examples
 a dancer it's
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
have
Fix the infinitive
to have
show examples
 a slim physique because you have to be light to do particular movements,
consequently
Linking Words
 we can say that most of the part is have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good
genetic
Replace the word
genetics
show examples
 and the right body.
Therefore
Linking Words
 performers who are unlucky with body can become exceptional dancers working out properly. For the second bunch of
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
, if you
born
Add a missing verb
are born
show examples
 without
talent
Correct article usage
a talent
show examples
 for
art
Use synonyms
, you can't do it. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
 it depends
from
Change preposition
on
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 what type of
art
Use synonyms
 you want
do
Add the particle
to do
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
unlike
Add the comma(s)
, unlike
show examples
 the dancers, the singer must have a talent or special abilities,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 you can be a singer
also
Linking Words
 with
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 right training, but
obviusually
Correct your spelling
visually
 you will have more difficulties and you'll never be like
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 type born with the skill to sing. In
conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
show examples
 I support both
thesis
Change to a plural noun
theses
show examples
, cause
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 am of the opinion
thata
Correct your spelling
that
that a
 with the best tools, everyone can do every type of
art
Use synonyms
 but the ones
whose
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 have the natural skill, will be always one step ahead.

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Task Achievement
Work on refining your thesis statement to clearly present your stance. Make sure that your introduction specifically addresses both viewpoints and clearly indicates your opinion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve the logical flow of your ideas by using clearer linking words and phrases. Structure your paragraphs more distinctly and ensure each one focuses on a single idea.
General Advice
Vary your vocabulary and grammar structures to make your writing more engaging. Pay attention to spelling and grammatical accuracy to enhance clarity and professionalism.
Task Achievement
You provided a clear personal opinion in the conclusion, which is a positive aspect of your essay.
Task Achievement
You included examples related to dance and singing, illustrating your points well.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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