IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pulpils, while other schools have a very relaxed dress code. What are the advantages and disadvantages of having a school uniform?

Numerous
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
mangers
Correct your spelling
managers
show examples
 are very specific in appearance
.they
Correct your spelling
They
determined
Wrong verb form
determine
show examples
one
Use synonyms
uniform
Use synonyms
 for all
students
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 give their
students
Use synonyms
 a relaxed dress code . Having a specific
uniform
Use synonyms
 is crucial for
students
Use synonyms
 to avoid bullying and wearing inappropriate clothes. On the
one
Use synonyms
 hand, many schools prefer to select mean clothes for
students
Use synonyms
 for many reasons .
One
Use synonyms
 main reason is to avoid bullying and unsuitable clothes .some
students
Use synonyms
 from
high
Correct article usage
the high
show examples
class
Use synonyms
 others from
middle
Correct article usage
the middle
show examples
 and low
class
Use synonyms
 and that
affect
Correct subject-verb agreement
affects
show examples
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
students
Use synonyms
 negatively.
Linking Words
for
Capitalize word
For
show examples
 example , many
student
Change to a plural noun
students
show examples
 from
night
Correct article usage
the night
show examples
class
Use synonyms
 may bully
on
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apply
show examples
another
Replace the adjective
another student
other students
show examples
students
Use synonyms
 from
middle
Correct article usage
the middle
show examples
 or low
class
Use synonyms
. Racism they do not wear fancy
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cloths
Correct your spelling
clothes
show examples
 like them .
Other
Correct quantifier usage
Another
show examples
 main reason ,o.
Schools
Change preposition
In schools
show examples
 most of the
students
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 are children or teenagers. So they like to wear bright
colors
Change the spelling
colours
show examples
 or immodest
Use synonyms
cloths
Correct your spelling
clothes
show examples
 and that may harm
students
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, wearing bright
colors
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colours
show examples
 will help
students
Use synonyms
 to not concern .some females wear immodest
Use synonyms
cloths
Correct your spelling
clothes
show examples
 and that
affect
Correct subject-verb agreement
affects
show examples
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
male
students
Use synonyms
 and may
causes
Change the verb form
cause
show examples
 aggressive attitude.
On the other hand
Linking Words
 ,
Add an article
the disadvantage
a disadvantage
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disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
show examples
 of wearing
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
uniform
Use synonyms
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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boring
Replace the word
boredom
show examples
 and suppression of freedom . Wearing
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
uniform
Use synonyms
 all the whole year
is make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
boring
Replace the word
bored
show examples
from
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the same design and
colors
Change the spelling
colours
show examples
.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
every
Correct your spelling
everyone
show examples
one
Use synonyms
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
uniform
Use synonyms
 except educational
stuff
Correct your spelling
staff
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
 ,
obligate
Wrong verb form
obligating
show examples
students
Use synonyms
 to wear
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
uniform
Use synonyms
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 them like
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
slave
Fix the agreement mistake
slaves
show examples
. They do not have
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 freedom to
chose
Wrong verb form
choose
show examples
 their own
Use synonyms
cloths
Correct your spelling
clothes
show examples
 which may impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their personality. forbid something like
uniform
Use synonyms
 and control their appearance may
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
affect
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their attitude .
To sum up
Linking Words
, wearing a
uniform
Use synonyms
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 advantages
such
Linking Words
 as
avoid
Wrong verb form
avoiding
show examples
 bullying and week g inappropriate
Use synonyms
cloths
Correct your spelling
clothes
show examples
.
Correct your spelling
while
while
Linking Words
 boring and
suppression
Replace the word
suppressing
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
freedom .

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coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the logical flow of ideas. Some points are not clearly connected, which makes it hard to follow your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph clearly addresses one main idea, and support it with sufficient examples and explanations.
task achievement
Expand your conclusion to summarize your main points more effectively and reinforce your argument.
task achievement
Ensure grammatical accuracy. There are many small errors that distract from your overall message, such as "Numerous of schools mangers" and "mean clothes."
task achievement
You present a good range of ideas regarding the advantages and disadvantages of school uniforms.
task achievement
Your essay demonstrates an understanding of the topic, which is a great foundation for further development.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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