IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people believe that global environmental problems should be dealt with internationally rather than domestically. What is your opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowadays, the
issue
Use synonyms
 of the environment has been spread worldwide,
thus
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people
Use synonyms
 should deal with it as an international
problem
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 rather than as a country
problem
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.
Therefore
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, it is crucial to discuss and examine
this
Linking Words
believe
Replace the word
belief
show examples
. Some
people
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 claim that
environmonet
Correct your spelling
environment
problems
Use synonyms
 are an international
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problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
instead
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 of being a
regoin
Correct your spelling
region
regional
Use synonyms
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 because of many reasons,
To begin
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,
people
Use synonyms
 should try to solve the
envorimental
Correct your spelling
environmental
problem
Use synonyms
 because it is an international
issue
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 that might cause
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
pollution in the air which
result
Correct subject-verb agreement
results
show examples
 from a lot of vehicles usage,
therefore
Linking Words
 it is not a region specific
issue
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 , so all
Use synonyms
goverments
Correct your spelling
governments
government
 should encourage
people
Use synonyms
 to use public
trasportation
Correct your spelling
transportation
 rather than using their own cars to attempt to decrease
this
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issue
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.
For example
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, some
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goverments
Correct your spelling
governments
government
 in the
world
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 should apply taxes for
people
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how
Correct word choice
who
show examples
 use their own cars.
In addition
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 to that, not only
Use synonyms
Add a missing verb
do goverments
show examples
goverments
Correct your spelling
governments
government
 have to
be worked
Wrong verb form
work
show examples
 but
also
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people
Use synonyms
 in the
world
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 try to minimize their usage of a
lot
Add the preposition
lot of
show examples
 factors that might increase global issues
such
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 as smoking.
Moreover
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, all countries try to
preform
Correct your spelling
perform
show examples
 international conferences to
rise
Correct your spelling
raise
show examples
 awareness of
people
Use synonyms
 about the global
environmnet
Correct your spelling
environment
environmental
problems
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 , and how
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 issues might affect the whole
world
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.
Also
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, they explain the protective methods that might be taken
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 consideration to avoid
further
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 damage to the earth. Authoritise should
also
Linking Words
preform
Correct your spelling
perform
show examples
such
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 brief
program
Fix the agreement mistake
programs
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 social media because recently, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 use their
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all
time
Correct article usage
the time
show examples
 which helps in increasing
awarness
Correct your spelling
awareness
 of
people
Use synonyms
.
In
Change preposition
From
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 my own
prespective
Correct your spelling
perspective
, I tend to believe that global
problems
Use synonyms
 are international
Use synonyms
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
 rather than regoin specific
Use synonyms
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
,
therefore
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 all
Use synonyms
goverments
Correct your spelling
governments
 should apply
restrict
Replace the word
restrictive
show examples
 roles and
rise
Correct your spelling
raise
show examples
 the
awarness
Correct your spelling
awareness
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 global issues and how to overcome
furthere
Correct your spelling
further
 complications and
consequences
Correct article usage
the consequences
show examples
 of
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this
Fix the agreement mistake
these issues
show examples
issue
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, the
problem
Use synonyms
 of
global
Correct article usage
the global
show examples
envirnoment
Correct your spelling
environment
has
been risen
Change to the active voice
risen
show examples
 recently which
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 an international
issue
Use synonyms
,
therefore
Linking Words
 all countries in the
world
Use synonyms
 should try to
have
Verb problem
find
show examples
a significant solutions
Correct the article-noun agreement
a significant solution
significant solutions
show examples
 to minimize the progress of the
problems
Use synonyms
. I encourage
people
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 to assist in
protection
Add an article
the protection
show examples
 of
this
Linking Words
world
Use synonyms
 as
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
one group that
try
Correct subject-verb agreement
tries
show examples
 to decrease toxic factors which affect our
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
.

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language
Ensure that all spelling errors are corrected, such as 'environmonet' to 'environment' and 'goverments' to 'governments'.
structure
Strengthen the introduction by providing a clearer thesis statement that explicitly presents your opinion.
coherence
Improve transitions between ideas and paragraphs to enhance flow and make connections clearer, such as using 'Additionally', 'Furthermore', or 'Moreover'.
task achievement
Clarify and support your main points with more specific examples and explanations, which will enhance the overall argument.
language
Check for grammatical errors, such as 'preform' to 'perform' and 'how use their own cars' to 'who use their own cars'.
content
The discussion of international responsibility regarding environmental issues is a timely and relevant topic.
content
The essay covers multiple viewpoints and suggests actions that can be taken to address environmental problems.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • transnational problems
  • climate change
  • ozone layer depletion
  • pollution
  • collaborative efforts
  • pooling of resources
  • expertise
  • technology
  • innovative solutions
  • international standards
  • race to the bottom
  • environmental standards
  • capacity
  • impacts
  • national sovereignty
  • independently
  • economic
  • social contexts
  • international consensus
  • legal
  • political systems
  • enforcement
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