In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that with the development of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology and society, everyone would read online or download free
e-
Use synonyms
books
Use synonyms
rather than
choice
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choose
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printed newspapers and
books
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. Considering the benefit of printed
books
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, I don't agree with
this
Linking Words
opinion. Undoubtedly ,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Internet technology and electric production manufacturing have developed rapidly
from
Change preposition
since
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20C90s
Correct article usage
the 20C90s
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.
However
Linking Words
the spread of
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
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in different areas is not equal, people in developing countries and some undeveloped areas probably can't
not
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apply
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get
advance
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advanced
show examples
electric products and surf
on line
Correct your spelling
online
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easily.
Linking Words
Secondly
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Secondly,
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not everyone can get
use
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used
show examples
to reading on screens, for
Correct article usage
the elderly
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elderly
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elderly,
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they need to learn how to search
on line
Correct your spelling
online
show examples
and download
e-
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books
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, for kids spending lots of time watching electronic devices may lead to nearsightedness.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, if there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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no more printed
books
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and newspapers,
publish
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publishing
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companies will find a new way to make money , people may have to pay from some platform to download some reading materials that they want to read, so in the future, getting every
e-
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books
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for free is overly optimistic
In addition
Linking Words
, printed newspapers and
books
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afford richer reading and buying experience. When we
using
Wrong verb form
use
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electronic
devises
Replace the word
devices
show examples
to read something is hard to pay attention to reading because we tend to be attracted by some
massage
Correct your spelling
messages
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or information
in
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on
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phones , computers and any other reading device.
Also
Linking Words
, some readers enjoy the smells and the touch of the papers, these kind of build some psychological link between readers and
books
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.
Finally
Linking Words
buying
books
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in book shops
also
Linking Words
a good way to socialize, famous cities
such
Linking Words
as London and Paris have worldwide well-known bookshops like Shakespeare Bookshop that
attracting
Wrong verb form
attract
show examples
tourists
all
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from all
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over the world to gather here not only
for buying
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to buy
show examples
books
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but
also
Linking Words
sharing
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to share
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their
thought
Fix the agreement mistake
thoughts
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about literature and philosophy. In conclusion,
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
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and
books
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cannot
replace
Wrong verb form
be replaced
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by
e-
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books
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because of
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
practical and cultural value.

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Language/Grammar
Make sure to proofread your essay for grammatical errors and typos, such as '20C90s' (which should be '1990s') and 'can't not' (which should be 'cannot' or 'can't'). Also, ensure that your argument flows logically and builds on previous points.
Content/Supplementary Information
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. For instance, when discussing the importance of printed books, you could reference studies or statistics that indicate reading from printed materials enhances retention or comprehension.
Content/Structure
Enhance your conclusion by summarizing your main arguments more clearly. It should reiterate your position with a strong statement that reflects the ideas presented in the body.
Strengths/Argumentation
You effectively articulated your perspective and supported it with several well-considered reasons.
Strengths/Positioning
Your essay presents a clear stance on the issue, showcasing your ability to formulate a strong opinion regarding the future of printed materials versus digital alternatives.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • cost-effective
  • cultural value
  • sentimental value
  • reliability
  • distracting
  • access to
  • digital devices
  • internet
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