Nowadays, there are many TV shows that allow ordinary people to go on television and become celebrities, even though really, they have no talent. People should not be allowed to go on TV shows unless they can demonstrate some skill or talent that is entertaining. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

These days, common people are going on television

although

Linking Words

they do not have any

talent

Use synonyms

to show to the audience. They are gaining popularity from social media, but actors who are working hard for the big screen are becoming neglected. I agree with

this

Linking Words

statement and I will discuss the points following with a valuable conclusion. The major reason behind

this

Linking Words

is social media

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because most of them are influencers. Once they get millions of views on the videos, they become celebrities on television despite their

talent

Use synonyms

Moreover

Linking Words

, reality shows in which they just

gaining

Wrong verb form

gained

show examples

fame and producers gave them a chance to become more popular.

For instance

Linking Words

- Sehnaj Gill is an example of

this

Linking Words

one. After she came back from the reality show called Big Boss, she became famous without any

talent

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

trend has several consequences. It can demotivate talented people who are working hard for big screens and never get a chance. Not only

this

Linking Words

, but it

also

Linking Words

sets an example for the new generation that they do not need any skills.

For example

Linking Words

, nowadays, social media influences everybody. so it is common for kids to learn those things because they spend most of their time on the Internet. In sum, I would like to say that promoters have to stop showing them unless they have any

talent

Use synonyms

In addition

Linking Words

, give the chance to grow to those people who actually deserve

this

Linking Words

success to become famous. If you are not supporting real

talent

Use synonyms

then

Linking Words

it may be a regrettable development for the whole of society

Kamalsohi10948Sat May 10 2025

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coherence

Make sure to clearly outline your main points in the introduction, providing a brief overview of what you will discuss.

coherence

In the conclusion, summarize your main points more clearly and restate your position to reinforce your argument.

task achievement

Provide more detailed examples to support your points, as this will enhance your argument and make it more convincing.

coherence

Ensure your writing flows smoothly from one point to another by using appropriate linking words and phrases.

task achievement

You have taken a clear stance on the issue, which is an important aspect of a persuasive essay.

task achievement

Your use of a personal example, like Sehnaj Gill, adds relevance to your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

259 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

celebrities
demonstrate
entertaining
talent
skills
motivate
diverse
relatable
personal growth
financial mobility
social mobility
cultural diversity
platform
voice
standards
rewarded
content
quality
opportunities
television industry

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Include an introduction and conclusion

When families have a meal together it is considered a social activity. Do you think eating together is important to people in your country?

When a new town is planned, it is more important to develop public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers for people to spend their free time in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think young people should be free to choose his or her job, but other people think they should be realistic and think more about their future. Discuss both views and give your own opinion